It's a tricky one that's for sure. My approach is obviously based on my own background. I went to public schools and lived in a small community where most people were blue collar workers. No-one had aspirations and the teachers certainly didn't have any aspirations for their pupils. I was one of only five out of 300 pupils who went to university. When I was at university it dawned on me that my fellow undergraduates weren't any smarter than the kids I went to school with, just their expectations had been different growing up. The more I read, the more I truly believe that. If anyone's interested, google John Fleming - he's worked wonders in 'deprived' schools as well as private schools.
As much as I will instill in my girls that they can do or be anything they want, their community, schooling and peers will play a part in that. DP is a train driver, I was a middle manager so their aspirations from looking at their parents will not be super high. I still battle feelings that I'm not good enough to do a particular job. Logically, I know that I am. I know that I'm smart and capable but the underlying feelings of not being good enough are really hard to budge and they're hard-wired into me from my background. Our DDs will not in all likelihood mix with high-flyers in their local community. I think it would be beneficial to them to mix with kids of high achievers at school so they understand that 'those' people are no different to them. So on that basis, I am leaning to private school for their secondary schooling depending on what their interests are.
I think I've found one that parallels the ethos that I will be instilling in my girls which is, you are as good as anyone but better than no-one. Unfortunately, it's in Bendigo which is 70km away. If I truly believe that's the best school for them then we will move there. We are pretty secure financially but if push came to shove, I'd take a loan to pay the fees.
and by the way, I will in no way 'pushing' my girls to be high achievers, or what society deems to be a high achiever. If DD1 wants to be a builder then I will be as happy as Larry if it makes her happy. I don't want her to be a builder who actually deep down wants to be a doctor or a lawyer but thought she wasn't good enough, if that makes sense.
Divvy's point about where you went to school being important is relevant here as well. I went to public school but worked in a profession that was mostly filled with ex private school and mixed with other professions who were likewise. There is an enormous benefit to being "an old Hale Boy" or "a St Hilda's Girl". Enormous. I agree it is wrong, but that's the way it is and I don't see it changing any time soon so that was certainly a factor for me in choosing a private school education for my kids - benefits of the here and now education but also benefits for their career down the track. Like fionas, I want my children to choose whatever career will make them happy, but I want them to have as many options to choose from as possible.
Were we living in our old area (affluent, inner city) they would be going to public school for primary and then private for high school. That's not an option here so they're private all the way. We made the move to our current area as a lifestyle choice though, so I guess we have the best of both worlds.
Wow, thanks Onyx. I just googled Walker Learning. Looks very well -rounded and covers some of the social and emotional bases that I feel are missing from mainstream curriculum. Will have to keep reading and investigating this one of course, but on first glance, it is appealing.
AND... would you know it?! Our local public school is one of the schools implementing the approach!
Great Santosha - you have a few great options
What Fionas said is a lot of the reasons my mum chose my school and i see it playing out with my school friends now too. this is a big swayer for me in choosing the schools for my boys too
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