Hi MT - there are so many variables aren't there? Its tough, and I can really relate to your thinking.

At the end of the day, if you don't consent they can't do ANYTHING to you. But at the same time you don't want to be using your precious energy in labour fighting it out with a random OB or midwife who won't listen to you. And no one really wants it to escalate to drastic measures either. Maybe you could prepare your lines IYKWIM....practice saying to yourself or your DH what you would say to an OB who was pressuring you into the bung in your arm i.e. "I am aware of the reasons why you wish for me to have a bung in my arm or [insert other intervention here!] however I am well informed of the risks associated and respectfully refuse." Or something like that. Sure they'll probably write it in your notes, but who cares.

One of the hospitals I talked to this week regarding my VBAC are happy for midwives to support me in their Birthing Centre. I simply sign a form saying I don't want a bung, or monitoring and they're happy with that.

If you are really butting heads with an OB or midwife, ask them to leave. If it gets to the point where you are being ignored or they simply won't listen, request different careproviders.

Are you planning on writing a birth plan? If so, I would make it detailed. Go into every possible scenario. And if they continue to ignore what you are saying to them in your refusal, get your DH to whip out a copy and politely point out to them that maybe they should have a read.

And as far as I knew you can discharge yourself from hospital at any point you wish. They can't restrain you last time I checked. If it is against their advice, then I'm sure they'll write that in your notes too. But if you're not comfortable in hospital then its your choice.

Good luck MT - I know that so much of this isn't really that black & white, but at the end of they day, its your body and your choice.