So I can blame my multiples tears on my psychological state? No way! I tore because Miles had a big head (37cm) and because my skin doesn't have all the pliability that I'd like it to have, which runs in my family. I also got stretch marks on my belly because it runs in the family to get stretch marks.

I'm just not sure that it's helpful for women to think that if only they have the right mindset that they will definitely remain tear-free. It actually sets up for feeling worse about the experience afterwards...how easy for others to then just say 'oh well you weren't relaxed enough'.