My last two were a good size, DD2 was 9lb 8.5ozs and 57cm (only a small head at 34cm) and DS2 was 10lb1ozs, 59cm and 37cm head. I actually didn't tear with him, only a small graze that didn't need stitching, so after having 1 epi and 2 tears it was so nice not to have stitches. I was on my back for both of them, but semi reclined. Both were also posterior babies and I did have some mild shoulder dystocia with both of them, but they were overall great births. Gravity is so important to help baby move down, so keep upright as much as you can. You've already had one decent sized bub with minimal trouble so I think you're more than capable of doing it again. You can't let the *fear* of a big baby crowd your thoughts - so much of it is mind over matter. If you had absolutely no idea of the possible size of your baby then you would go into your birth with a clear mind and just go about the business of giving birth, but once you let thoughts of a big baby in, then you really need to push them aside. Giving birth to a big baby is no different to giving birth to a small one.
I didnt tear with my first DD but did with my DD2 2nd degree and sutured, DS i had another 2nd degree tear but left it to heal naturally. Birth times were 6hrs, 2hrs then just a 10min one. I did the peri massage thing but i can tell you when a baby is coming quickly you just dont care. The thiing iwould say is that a tear is so so so much better than an epi. The body knows how to heal itself better this way as it is natural. That is why when you watch an c/section the only bit they cut is the first bit, most other layers are torn! sounds gross but is better.......
I have read the pink kit... i wouldnt waist my money but there are a lot of other people who love it....sorry that probably doesnt help you at all
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