please help-Dilemma-how long did your DH stay at hospital after birth

[Oorki Galoorki]

My Dh would have gotten a big kick up the butt for saying that!! Nothing gets in the way of family time!! esp NB bonding...

[Jellyfish]

Wow, you are not being unreasonable in the slightest. My DP actually didn't leave the hospital until I left (about 3 days after the birth).

[barney]

ohh it would be nice if he could give poker a miss just this time i dont blame you for being upset by this hun .
my dh rekons his not going anywere until i am, im even trying to con him up not to sleep in the car out the front and we only live 20mins away good luck with your birth sweety

[paradise lost]

My DD's daddy felt exactly the same about hobbies etc. not being affected by the baby. And his weren't. Because i had to do it all on my own. I dumped him when she was 8 weeks old.

I really hope this doesn't happen to you, tell him NOW this isn't acceptable to you, it is a major deal-breaker and if he feels poker is more important than his wife and his child then he should go be with pok because he does NOT deserve you at all.

Bx

[grub17]

get a large birth book and aim for his head. MEN! No wonder the world is the mess it's in.

i would point out to him, that's fine to keep his hobbies etc BUT some things are more important than poker and he can sacrifice is hobby ONE night for the birth of his first, and at this stage only, child.

I would also start talking to him about practically what he'll need to do. men need things to do. and it needs to be clear - is he having skin-to-skin with the baby? i'd suggest that and really talk it up; does he want to be there for the first feed? etc who'll be with the bub while you have your first shower? waht if there's a c-sect etc

I would also be pointing out in less than a kindly way that his ''schedule'' is going to distract you and believe it or he needs to man up and support his wife in labour and not look at his watch for his game. Does poker happen every week? I imagine the answer is yes, so he can miss a week.

If none of that budges HRH, I would dob him in to all the friends and family espeically his mum and sister (if they are about). shame him out.

and finally, i second gracious goddess' comment "he's being a twat'' lol.

FWIW - this is our first baby and my DH (who has been away for 8 weeks and due home in a week eeek) will be staying at the hospy round-the-clock with us. (we are going private tho and there's no visiting hours for dads).

[Stevie]

my DH missed the birth due to work, but i had her 10.15pm he got there about 10.45pm and didnt leave until 1am.

and like others have mentioned maybe he wont feel this way once bub is actually here, something ive learned off my DH, take notice of what he does not what he says lol.

[Jaycee]

Wow, I would of hit the roof too!
I had DS at 4am, we'd been at the hospital since 3pm the previous afternoon and DH didn't leave until around 2pm that day and was back at 5pm (the hospital had a strict rest time in the maternity ward from 2 til 4pm). He then didn't leave til 10pm and was back first thing the next morning!
Think your DH is being a bit of a twat, DH would of got a good kick up the backside if he'd of said that to me!

[Muppity]

Your DH sounds like mine!

He was telling me last night that when I am in hospital he will get his parents to stay in the house (not my favorite suggestion but whatever gets him through is fine - I won't be there) and he will pop in every night after work, "maybe for an hour or so" before he goes home to the dinner that he will get his Mum to cook!

I suggested that he may very well have other plans...not quite in those words...