please help-Dilemma-how long did your DH stay at hospital after birth

[misty]

He will skip it then he said. Im staying o/night sunday night after gel induction then on drip monday so he thinks it will all be over by afternoon. Hes argument is that he will need to leave for sleep and things anyway. Ive said he can leave at close of visiting hrs for spouses (9pm)
His response was if he leaves at 6.30 its only a few hours earlier and then he can play poker and sleep. He keeps saying that its important not to let hobbies/him time/me time slide just because bub is born. (What is me time anyway??? i cant remember having any for months)

give him a big slap up the side of the head for me and tell him to wake up to himself! He is going to be a father, there is no such thing as 'me' time anymore - at least not in the begining. He needs to look at his priorities IMHO.

men!

[Roryrory]

Personally I would be surprised if he is capable of driving to Poker, least of all being sentient enough to play. If you are induced Sunday night chances are you will either have a long and restless night Sunday and possibly even a baby by Monday morning. Now, if that happens he will probably be in need of sleep for most of Monday, as will you! And if the bub isn't born til Monday arvo then FOR sure he will be too tired to go to poker, because you both will have been up for possibly 24 hours at a stretch (babies often take a looong time to make an appearance!)

It sounds like normal "I am not going to let this baby change things" behaviour. Stupid, immature, crazy, insentive - sure! But within the bounds of normal. My DH said and planned some crazy things before #1 was born, as I am sure I did. But bubs have a way of putting aside the best laid plans.

Personally, I think it comes down to this. You don't want him to go. Once that baby is born his job is to be there for you. Simple. He shouldn't go for that reason alone. But it sounds like the deeper issue is his fears about how his life will change after bub arrives....

[Doing my best]

I don't think you will need to worry..

My DH had these wonderful ideas of what he was going to do while I was in hsopital, and when DD actually arrived, he couldn't stay away. He was the proudest dad and all I was allowed to do was BF when he was there.

I am sure he will see there are more important things then poker on the day..

[misty]

oh, for what it's worth. This last time DH kept on looking at the clock and commenting how tired he was during my last labour and just afterwards, he wanted out of there as soon as possible. I was ropeable. he thought HE was tired! Hello.....
I tried to ignore it, but really it was the last thing I needed. As it was, he was out of there as soon as he could make a getaway, but that wasn't until at least 3hrs afterwards. And he really copped an ear full about it several days later when I was stressed and overtired and falling apart trying to look after a newborn and still waiting for my milk to come in properly.

It really is a good idea to try and sort this out now, rather then hoping he will change his mind - because trust me you don't need the stress or resentment at the time your baby is born or in the few week following - because everything else will be hard enough, even if you get an easy baby like I did.