You will find less people come the 2nd time... Which for me was GREAT! I was also very anxious about it and had a bad experience the first time.

The 2nd time I worded up my DH and he became like my security guard. We waited 24 hours before we told anyone other than close family I had given birth. Also, in the message we sent out, we didn't include the hospital name, so if anyone wanted to come they had to contact us to ask, at which point my DH would tell them not to bother because we'd be out in a day or 2.