I had a 7 year gap and felt teh same as you. Had epidural first time and wanted this experience to be different. i started by going to antenatal class again which I thoroughly enjoyed. I could then focus just on what I wanted to know and let the rest slide by. I found out about TENS machines which I ended up hiring for use in labour. They're really good and I recommend you look into that.
I also knew that I didn't want to be disappointed, so I didn't plan ANYTHING beyond that. I just went to hospital open to whatever happened. I didn't take much with me because I know most of it never gets touched. The hospital also has everything, they supplied drinks, the yoga ball, etc. I just got there, knelt down, felt uncomfortable, so i turned around and sat (supported by Dh) and went from there. Was a much better experience.
Good luck xo