Thanks everyone, it made me feel so much better.
One of his main reasons for the c/s was because of damage to my pelvic floor. He said that because i had a 3rd degree tear, i would tear again and would have a permanately weakened pelvic floor and be incontinent. He was actually surprised that I wasnt now. He gave me an internel u/s to check the size (which was spot on for my dates) and during this he also checked the strength of my pelvic floor by pulling on it. Then quite smugly annouced that it was weakened like i had been lieing. Of course its weakend i pushed a baby out of there 15 months ago lol.
The OB I am going to see now was recommended to me by a friend. She has seen her for her two children. She was very impressed with her and says she is very open to alternative methods of birth and pain relief etc. So hopefully it goes well. Its just so different to last time when I went through the midwife clinic, but we have moved and I dont know all the services available here.
So fingers crossed it goes well and thanks for the words of encouragement.