MG, I understand some of what you are going through. I went through severe shoulder dystocia with my first deliver (shoulders got stuck) I've been told by some Dr's that I should not try a natural birth again and another say that it is possible with the right care. I'm so confused!It's been nearly 2 years and I still haven't come to a decision on the matter.
I think for me a lot will depend on being able to find a Ob that I can trust completely. I plan to start looking before TTC. Have you thought about talking with your Dr about what did happen and ask some of the questions that are bothering you. My MCHN suggested this to me when I wasn't dealing well with what happended and I think it really help.
Sorry, I haven't heard of the pink kit, is it a book?

All the best