Stopping Fear-Tension-Pain in late pregnancy

[amberj]

I have done a LOT of reading about labour and feel very informed and that has made me feel quite empowered and calm about the whole birth thing....until now. Now I am 40w + 3, and I feel like I have started on this roller coaster that is gathering speed and drawing me into this cycle that I REALLY want to stop now.

I know in my head that a normal term is up to 42 weeks and that I should not be concerned that I am overdue. But it seems there is such a stigma attached to "overdue-ness" that its hard to avoid. Of course all of my friends and family are constantly asking if I've had the baby (like I wouldn't tell them!!), so it adds to the general expectations. Today at my midwife appointment, they said I now go on to another part of the clinic where they would start to discuss induction. Its like this "process" had started, around me and within me and I find it very hard to resist.

Add to that my naturally anxious tendancies, and I find myself becoming increasingly nervous, frustrated and stressed. I know all about the bad cycle this sets up and I am looking for ways to combat it right now before it gets out of hand. Is it too late to start relaxation stuff (ie- do I need to have been doing it for months for it to become part of the unconscious that will help in labour)? Does anyone else have any practical suggestions for stopping this cycle now before it gets out of control? Or just support (all those words of support really do help- thank you!!!)

[Trillian]

Never too late to start relaxation stuff at all - who knows, maybe you need to relax and let go so that labour can start all on it's own? Another thing that may help is to put your phone onto the answering machine with a message letting everyone know that you haven't had the baby, we will certainly let you know when we do and thanks for all your well wishes etc. It gets really depressing when everyone starts the phonecalls - their hearts are in the right place but they really can't appreciate how little it does to help you think of anything other than the impending birth.

It really is the hardest part of pg I think - the waiting around and getting to the stage where *decisions* have to be made, but do remember that you don't have to rush into anything, you may not have much time on your side, but you still have enough to let things happen at their own pace kwim?

Also, have you thought about natural induction methods? There is a list of them on the main site or you could have a massage or acupuncture - even if none of them *work* it will be fun trying and a massage is appreciated at any stage of pg.

Good luck hun

[tan32]

Hi AmberJ i just want to say what you are experiencing is normal, my DS was 40 + 10 days over, well meaning family and friends ringing and checking etc just starts to annoy you. Learning some relaxation techniques wont hurt, you could always use them later anyway.
Big hugs to you

[Lolli]

Oh you poor thing... it's the waiting and the stress and the anticipation that gets to you, especially when it's all up in the air.
to you hun

[chocolatecatty]

I second not answering the phone and just letting it go straight to message bank. It's not rude....what's rude (well...kinda rude) is people ringing to you check if you've had bubs!! Do they really think you'd not tell them? And if you delayed telling them well that's your perogative (sp!) and it would come from a very good reason I'm sure.

As for induction, given you've studied up on all this labour business (good on you), well, stay strong and don't let them pressure you into something you may later regret. Do you have a good support person who can stand by you and delay any intervention like induction?

Yeeeehaaaaaa, you're having a baby anytime from now! Focus on that! Read some birth stories, go over what you've learned about labour and think about the fantastic thing that your body will go through. Anticipation is what got me through those last few weeks/days. Having a baby is sooo exciting...I'm excited for you just thinking about it!

Swimming is also a great way to relax (I think). Clears the mind etc. I say. Even if you just float!

[Emma1979]

i haven't read all the responses but just wanted to say re: relaxtion.... i've just downloaded for around $12 from the internet some relaxtion stuff and i play it on my
mp3 player before i go to sleep, and its really helping.... it helps you to switch off and gain control of your body thru breathing, slowing the heart rate down, reducing blood pressure etc.... the one i've downloaded is actually hypnosis... some nights i can honestly say it works, i am under hypnosis while im listening to it, other nights its just very relaxing, but i wouldn't say i was 'under'...

there are all sorts of things you can download depending on what you are wanting... relaxtion for sleep, hypnosis for quitting smoking, controlling appetite... im sure there would be hypnosis for calm birthing too...

just an idea, you never know you might find it useful for relaxtion over the next few days (or even during your birth?!)

good luck xx