My brother and SIL are expecting their first baby, they have had a few issues with her pregnancy, the main one being Polyhydramnios, diagnosed at 24 weeks as she was measuring 36 wks (!) she has been having weekly checks, u/s, to monitor fluid levels, which have been going up and down, but more down, she is currently 30 wks, and measuring 36wks still.
At my mums place the other day, my Brother told us that the baby (little boy, Isaac ) will be here in 7 wks, my jaw dropped, "why?? whats happening??" SIL explained the OB doesnt want her to go over 37 wks, I asked if she was being induced or having a c/s, she replied that they hadnt really discussed it yet, but the OB seemed keen on cs (). I started to tell her that she would be much better off labouring, and better for Isaac too, but she got that closed look on her face and cut in saying " I will do whatever the OB says is best" and walked away....
OK, probably my own fault that,I am a bit outspoken when it comes to birth and all, but she just wasnt even interested in listening.
Anyway, mum had a chat with my bro later on, she asked why the baby was being delivered so early, surely it would be better for Isaac to stay where he was for as long as it was healthy??, Bro said he didnt know, they were just doing what they were told by the OB, hes a doctor, surely he knows whats best?? (*snort* from me)
I am having a very hard time coming to grips with their way of thinking, it just appalls me that they are so uneducated about whats best for them and the baby...
I know its not MY baby and its not MY birth, its not really any of my business.....but Im just hoping and wishing that everything will go OK and my nephew will be born healthy, and my SIL will be ok with her choices.
I wonder if they aren't telling you everything? If they are happy to just 'go with the flow' with whatever the OB says, then maybe they haven't really listened to all the reasons properly and it may be a bit more serious than they are letting on? I would like to think that to deliver a baby at 37 weeks, there would have to be a serious problem (but that's in my ideal world ) I have no idea, but you just never know. And at the end of the day, some people are happy to trust their medical professional and there's nothing you can do about it. Instead of pushing other options, just have an easy chat to them about why the doc thinks bub needs to come that early. More information might come to light if they don't feel like they are being judged or pressured (not saying that you are doing ANY of those things, but they may feel that way). An easy conversation and maybe some brochures on other options for them given subtly may slowly bring them around. But in the end, like you said, it's totally their choice, just like it was our choice to give birth the way we wanted. All that matters is that little boy is healthy and happy In saying that though, it is so difficult to watch someone do something that you don't agree with, especially when it is family. Big hugs to you xxx
It is a bit odd, but one would hope the OB has a good reason to induce (whether naturally or by c/s) at 37 weeks. At least at 37 weeks, bub is considered full term. Unfortunately, sometimes as much as we would like to slap some sense into some people with their thinking, we can't. We just have to accept that this is their decision.
There seems to be a few issues here with her preg, there might be other issues too. She is under ob care for a reason and she might not like you second guessing her situation. - which is probably hard enough for her as it is.
Thanks guys, I have wondered if theres other stuff going on that theyre not telling, but theyve been pretty open with everything throughout the pregnancy...
I do try VERY hard not to come across as some know it all Birthing activist (because Im not, i just find it all very interesting and have been doing ALOT of research so my next birth is not the nightmare that Jacobs was)
sigh......
I should probably just pull my head in, I dont think Im helpng her or my brother at all.
I am so glad to hear that she is at 30 weeks and the Polyhydramnious appears to be stabilised and hasn't gone up as such
With DD I also had Polyhydramnious and my OB also wasn't going to let me go far past 37-38 weeks at the absolutel max. In the end we didn't have to worry about induction as my waters ruptured anyway at 33 weeks. But once again it was obstetric care and I didn't know any better, but there is a pretty high chance that she will deliver early as the uterus can't cope with the excess fluid, although she is doing fabulously especially with the massive variation at 24 weeks. There are increased risks of complications, or haemoraging (sp), cord coming out witht he waters due to the shear amount of force, and the placenta tearing away due to the massive and quick reduction in the size of the uterus when the waters to break, which is most likely why they perceived "best" care is to not let the pregnancy go too long.
Aside from knowing it could cause PTL I didn't know anything much about the complications with DD, and when my waters broke we weren't in a screaming hurry to get to the hospital 1 1/2 hours later we arrived due to hospitals being full etc, but it worked out for us in the end.....
Take care hun, it can be hard to find the balance between sharing knowledge and not, I have found it very difficult with SIL and basically just give my opinion when asked, and then I leave her to make her decisions even though I do NOT agree with them, I find that keeping my mouth shut and ignoring them is easier and saves me getting stressed or worked up
Maybe it's all a bit scary and overwhelming for them and they just don't need to hear anything else, you know?
If my sibling told me they were having their baby at 37 weeks I'd immediately ask why too. Either way, you know it can't be for a good reason
Just to clarify, I certainly didn't think you had treated your bro and SIL badly. I also thought you were just venting, but my response probably didnt reflect that. I understand exactly where you're coming from and why you wanted to vent.
I am glad I was able to answer your questions for you hun, and hope that all goes well for them ove the next 7 weeks to the safe delivery of Master Issac xxoo
Just my 2 cents..... maybe more of the responses could have actually looked more at the questions that STARRYSKY asked on the subject at hand which was Polyhydrominous and the reasons for potential early delivery, and not just focus on one portion of the original post
Ok, knowing that there may be a very valid reason why they are doing this and you kinda understand that, at some point you have to choose between having what you really want (did you know if she possibly did want a natural vaginal birth?) and pushing on with the pg (pardon the pun LOL) at the risk of something going wrong, or do you make a compromise for the safety and health of the baby? Often we are faced with decisions and even though we know we don't want the alternative sometimes we have no other choice but to take it ITMS. Being a Birth Activist isn't just about extolling the virtues natural, intervention free vaginal births - it's about supporting the right of women to choose how she wants to give birth and this is what she has chosen It may not be what you or I would choose, but this is what she has chosen.
What you should do now is redirect your energies to offer her support for when she has her c/s. Possibly even talk to her about what options she has in the way of having bubs in recovery with her (if he is well enough) and be there for her if she needs to talk about this. She may have shut you out about this because maybe she is feeling like a bit of a failure/let herself and bubs down and I know that when you are feeling like that, it's not helpful to have someone question what you have chosen to do so your first instinct is to shut down kwim?
WDYT of this, im a bit horrified...
). I started to tell her that she would be much better off labouring, and better for Isaac too, but she got that closed look on her face and cut in saying " I will do whatever the OB says is best" and walked away....
) I have no idea, but you just never know. And at the end of the day, some people are happy to trust their medical professional and there's nothing you can do about it. Instead of pushing other options, just have an easy chat to them about why the doc thinks bub needs to come that early. More information might come to light if they don't feel like they are being judged or pressured (not saying that you are doing ANY of those things, but they may feel that way). An easy conversation and maybe some brochures on other options for them given subtly may slowly bring them around. But in the end, like you said, it's totally their choice, just like it was our choice to give birth the way we wanted. All that matters is that little boy is healthy and happy 
In saying that though, it is so difficult to watch someone do something that you don't agree with, especially when it is family. Big hugs to you xxx
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