I agree Lulu it is true.
I (as most of you know) believe that birth is Woman's business and I don't think not being in the room whilst your child is born makes a man any less.
My Dad was at home in bed sleeping when I was born! He had to get up at 6am to go to work so when my Mum called to say I'd been born at 2.37am he just said he'd be in to visit her after work that night and went back to bed! When my sister was born 3 years later my Mum insisted he be there. He was fine until he saw my sister pop out, then he freaked out so much they had to give him some of the gas to calm him down!!
My dad was home in bed asleep, LOL!! He was told to go home as nothing was going to happen until the next morning but I had much different ideas. I came out like a little rocket. The midwife just made it from the station.
My DH was right by my side the whole time through both my labours. My first labour I didn't listen to DH at all, poor bugger. I didn't mean to do it but that is just what happened but he never stopped trying or making suggestions. I love him for that.
Second labour he was the most amazing support person and talked me through every single contraction and was my focus point the whole time. He never left my side no matter what position I made him get into. I honestly couldn't have done it without him. I credit my drug free labours to my DH because he got me through.
I'm all teary now. I think I need to tell him this.
my dad was waiting outside cos mum had a c/s with me four days after her waters broke when nothing had kicked labour along. dad had signed the consent forms the night before for early morning c/s and was scared stiff the Ob would still be as drunk as he was that night so was standing guard! i wasn't born til after 2pm, so i think the Ob must have needed more time to sober up lol. mum was caesered under a general so dad got to hold me first, which she was fine with. she wasn't so fine with being taken back to the room and finding my nana (who, at the time, mum wasn't close to) holding me!
my DH was with me for as much as he could be - i was given gels on Tues night while he was still at work so he called in on his way home (about 1am) just to spend some time with me and see how i was going, went home to bed, spent the next day with me (was supposed to be put on the drip but cervix unfavourable so more gels) went home that night, then was there for the whole time i laboured the next day and into the next morning. he was a fantastic support and i think my experience (c/s etc) would have been a negative one had he not been there to support me. having said that, for the last 10 hours, i also had my SIL in there with me. DH wasn't and isn't a nervous person so that strength rubbed off onto this very anxious chicky! he was there while c/s was performed and between him and a VERY understanding (male) anaesthetist i managed to keep informed and calm while she was born.
and DH was good - he knew not to let ANYONE touch our poppet apart from him until i'd had cuddles (well, middies and paed were ok - but no family!) after what had happened with mum and me lol
My dad was in the labour ward every single time - there are six of us. plus He was even there with mum when she had to deliver a still born baby boy who had died at 6months. As such I have always been brought up beleiving that the role of a father was to support the mother throughout pg and birth.
Dad was working in Canberra when I was born in Sydney.
He was working in Sydney when my sister was born in Canberra.
My youngest sister was due mid August, Dad told mum any day except the afternoon of the 14th as he had a super important meeting on. She popped out at 2:30 on the 14th, but he did make it (think he went back to work soon afterwards though!). Mum said he wasn't much help - he was too busy watching the monitor and telling her when she was having a contraction - like she didn't know!!!
Last edited by Cally; September 3rd, 2009 at 08:37 PM.
: forgot something
My Dad was there for me being born, but when my sister came 18mths later, he was with me in the toilet! (or so the story goes)
Mum and dad didnt have any friends or family that could look aftyer me, so i can along, i remember nothing and i dont really know the full story, only the joking bits.
Dad raves about how seeing me being born was the best experince of his life he would have been asking a million wuestions thou, driving everyone insane - he is quiet technical, so i am sure the questions would have been off putting to mum!
In response to Lulu's comments ... DH will not be with me during the labour part of our next child, i will call him at the last possible moment and if he misses it- so be it. I love him to bits and he honestly tried, but he is USELESS in hospital and situations that he is not in control... he didnt cope well and fidgeted and fluffed and did nothing that i had previously asked as he was so stressed... the birth is about ME and my experince and i was unable to concentrate fully, ineeded him to pre-empt and he couldnt (the one time in his life!) and it this coupled with time limits and my OB that i think stalled my labour and ended in a c/s that i remain somewhat traumatised by...
difficult call, but i agree, sometimes its not the right place for them!
My Dad was in th eroom with my Mum - I'm 33. He says it was one of the deepest bonding experiences of their marriage. He also tells of all the back rubbing he did during the labour. Poor mum was in labour from Friday to 1am Monday when I was born - a long time!! And Dad did the traditional wet the babies head pub thing afterwards with cigars and all apparantly.
I think for me Dad was on his way to the hosp from work ? My sister... I've heard he was at home eating spaghetti... Mind you, I haven't asked since I was a littlie, so they may not be true....
I'm 35 and was born at the Sydney Royal Hospital for Women back when it was in Paddington and not Randwick. Dad's had to write to the Ward Matron to ask permission to be present at the birth. Mum had gone 21 days overdue and they booked her in for an induction. Dad was a Nurse and he dropped Mum off in the morning then went and did his shift. He was back in time for my birth. Of the 6 babies that were induced that day, I was the first one to arrive at 9.30 that night and my Dad spent the next couple of hours running back and forth with status updates for the other Dads in the waiting room.
My Step-Dad was there the whole time when my Mum had my half-brother at the same hospital 4 years later.
I sent DH to work in the morning, but he came back at midday to take me to hospital. He was there every second until DS was born. I couldn't have done it without him. Both my Dad's were adamant that my DH should be at the birth
my dad was the first to hold me coz i was born by c/s under general same with my sister but later that day they had a fight so my dads name isnt on my birth certificate
DH was awesome for J's birth i thought he would be grossed out for sure but he loved every minute of it my Mum and MIL were both also present the only person who had been present at a VB was my MIL but DH and mum were awesome for ppl who had never witnessed anything like it
My parents traveled all the way across Brisbane so Dad could be present at my birth, at Boothville Hospital, the only place that allowed it.
I've never heard Dad's side of the story but Mum told me he was quite supportive, apart from when he said something like "I know it's painful but could you hurry it up a bit? The cricket starts at 3."
I'm pretty sure Dad was there when my sisters were born, too. It made perfect sense to me because they had told me it takes a Mum and a Dad to make a baby.
I was a c-sec (placenta priv' and 1 month prem) and in those days dads were told to wait outside the operating rooms.
Before my mom went into theatre my dad had to rush to another hospital an hour away to get blood for my mom and had got stopped by cops on his way back, when he told the cops what he was doing they gave him an escort back to the hospital where my mom was.
He had to get up at 6am to go to work so when my Mum called to say I'd been born at 2.37am he just said he'd be in to visit her after work that night and went back to bed! When my sister was born 3 years later my Mum insisted he be there. He was fine until he saw my sister pop out, then he freaked out so much they had to give him some of the gas to calm him down!!
he would have been asking a million wuestions thou, driving everyone insane - he is quiet technical, so i am sure the questions would have been off putting to mum!
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