Ah-ha, so my mother was right, co-sleeping WILL kill DS. Oh wait, he ain't dead yet and I actually get some sleep!

Caro, it's great to hear of someone else with a baby in the bed and a husband in the other room! DH won't sleep with DS in case he rolls over or something, but I quite like being able to lie in once in a while. And DS loves a pillow - well, his head propped up. He needs that to sleep; I currently use a soft toy but when he's in bed with me he has my arm and a pillow. I wouldn't let him have a pillow on his own, but he does sleep better with his head a little propped up. As IK says, maternal instincts are better than guidelines.