B456 - I fully understand and have on a number of occassions supported women through an elective c/section. My concerns are not with women who know the risks to themeselves and their babies in c/section. MY concerns are with women who chose c/section as a safer quicker option without knowing the risks or in fact believing they exist. They are also with the doctors who perform c/section as a birth choice for women who believe it is safer and quicker.

I fully (and on a personal level ) understand emotional reasons for thinking of c/section as an option. I know for myself when I am pregnant with my next child I will need to work hard to trust my body to push my baby out. The last baby I birthed through my vagina was not alive - it's going to be something I am going to have to really work on.

However, because I have seen what I have with c/section and because I know the risks I won't choose it as an option unless it is medically necessary. Mostly though because I believe that birth is a process. I believe that the time it takes to grow our children inside of us, the emotions that bubble up, the fears, the joys, the sadnesses and the memories that pregnancy and birth bring are very very important for our emotional and spiritual growth. The emotions that have to be grappled with to dilate that extra centimetre and the fear that has to be released can be cathartic. I know for me during my first birth it was very much like that. I too have suffered abuse as a young person and I am certain this had much to do with my difficult first labour. Birth is very releasing I believe.

That isn't to say that the process of surgery and the informed and empowered decision around that cannot be that also. I believe so wholly in the process of birthing. I believe in the intuitiion of birth. I lament at that beauty being taken from the process and it being about incisions and drugs and monitors when it's not necessary. I am a medical person so I do know and have seen as I mentioned before c/section save the life of mothers and babies or indeed just make it possible to give birth at all.
Please know though that I do fully understand that emotional health as a reason for c/section. Again, my push is that a fully informed decision is made - you clearly made that. I am so happy that you made the point of emotional reasons for c/section.

Rainbow: Your needs and experiences have been made very clearly. I am unsure however that they have been made on an informed level. I am not sure if you are being antagonistic but to quote B456 I owuldn't be me if I didn't comment...
Baggy vagina??????? PLease! I have pushed five babies out of my very capable vagina and I have an incredibly satisfying sex life as does my husband of nearly 13 years.!
There is a limit Rainbow to how many c/sections can be safely performed and if c/section were everyones birth of choice and you had an obs who was happy to perform major surgery so your vagina isn't baggy then again that's your decision. Your baby and your body.
I agree that women shouldn't be "forced" into vaginal birth but Rainbow that's actually how babies are designed to come out! I disagree emphatically with you. C/section should not be made available to people just because they want it. C/section is major surgery with risks that actually do come about sometimes. It is erroneous to believe that c/section is a safer birth option because the facts say otherwise. It is quicker (sometimes) yes but not safer.

As for women who have enjoyed birthing. Well I am another one! I LOVE giving birth. I LOVE labouring. I LOVE IT!!! I enjoy it and I would say without hesitiation the births of my children were the most empowering and enjoyable experiences of my life. Even the birth of my sleeping baby was empowering in a way that is hard to explain...

Koombyah no but chanting yes! I have a SIL who is a music therapist and I have used chants in my labour - the sounds we make with our mouths and the shape of our lips has a lot of impact on labour.

You sound like you had a traumatic birth experience. I would argue that your experience would have been far more positive had you had continuity of care throughout your pregnancy and laboaur by a midwife. You would have had support - you certainly wouldn't have had so many vaginal examinations which I may add should certainly not leave your vagina sore.

Stick around Rainbow and I am sure you will be hearing many more positive birth experiences!!! However they don't just "happen". You have to educate yourself, surround yourself with support, choose a place to birth that feels safe for you with care providers you develop a relationship with and trust.