On Friday night I went to bed much later than normal for no particular reason. I realised the time was 12.30am and I thought I'd better go to sleep so I could get some rest in before the baby came. Given I was 40+5 at that stage I knew there might not be much longer to go!Overnight I was stirred by a few contractions, they weren't really strong but they were enough to wake me and for me to register that it was a contraction. I woke fully at about 6am and had a couple more contractions. I realised they were coming kind of regularly so I thought I'd time them for curiousity's sake, they were fluctuating between 5-8 minutes apart. I texted my midwife Jo and said "I'm having some contractiony type pains, about 3/10 pain and about 6 minutes apart" and then I woke DH and told him that we would probably have a new baby to cuddle at some stage over the weekend.
I continued on with the morning as usual, had some brekky and just did normal Saturday morning stuff. DH and I had a minor heated argument when at 8.20 he decided to inflate the birth pool just in case - he had to leave for his chiro apppointment at 8.40 and he hadn't showered or anything yet. He had a stress, which in turn caused me a stress and I told him that he had to come back in a better headspace, which (thankfully) he did.
The contractions continued at about the same intensity and same distance all morning. I messaged Jo again at about 9ish to let her know it was much the same. She said just to keep her in the loop with any changes, but said she expected it to ramp up later in the afternoon or overnight.
DH got home at about 10. We just hung out around the house, watched some telly and got a few little things done. He started saying he wanted some lunch at about 12.30 so I asked him what he wanted. He decided eventually that he wanted a burger, and the best burger shop is near his mum's house - about 20 mins away. I told him to go and get a burger, but to take DS with him so I could have a nap without being disturbed. He said he would go and eat at his mum's so DS could see her and I could have a decent rest. I agreed that this would be a good idea and DS would be happy to see his Nanny.
The boys left and I went to bed, couldn't really sleep so just rested and played on my phone a bit. About half an hour later I had a massive contraction, felt like double the strength and length of any of the previous ones, and felt the urge to use the loo quite strongly. Once it passed I went to the bathroom and sat on the loo. Quite soon after that I had another big contraction and heard a pop and a gush, my waters had broken. I checked the loo and the water was all clear. I texted Jo and told her that my waters had broken and I'd let her know if anything changed.
I went back to bed, thinking I might be able to finish off my rest, but the contractions kept coming and they were becoming more difficult to meditate through. (I was getting through the contractions throughout the morning by focusing on my breathing and visualising a golden ball of light moving through my body, starting at my toes and finishing at the top of my head). Lying in bed was making them much more painful and the only place I could think of being comfortable was sitting on the loo, so back to the bathroom I went.
Jo texted me to see how I was going and to see if I'd had a show. I told her I hadn't had a show that I had noticed but the contractions were more intense and possibly closer together. I told her I'd time a couple and let her know. For the next 15 mins or so I timed the contractions, and they were definitely closer than before, averaging about 3 minutes apart. I texted Jo to let her know this. She asked if I wanted her and Lucy (a midwife from a local hospital who wants to become a private midwife so she's shadowing Jo) to come now, I said that I thought she should as they were getting more and more intense.
When I knew Jo and Lucy were coming I messaged DH and said 'you need to come home'. A few minutes later he texted back 'yay'. I knew the pool was up but I thought I remembered him saying something about the sides not being completely full so I went to go check. This was so difficult, I couldn't barely walk and the contractions felt like they were endless. I prayed for God to give me the strength to get the pool finished and I managed to get the pump connected and the walls finished off. I went to the laundry to see if the hose was connected to the tap, it wasn't and I almost cried. It was back to the loo for me.
When I got back to the bathroom I had another huge contraction that caused me to throw up and for more amniotic fluid to gush out. When it passed I messaged DH and said 'like now I can't do the pool and I need it now'. I'm not sure how long it had been but it felt like he was taking longer than he should to get back. My DH loves to talk, and so does his mum and I knew there was a chance they were standing around talking about something that really didn't matter. (I asked DH later, he said that when he got the first text he had just put DS in the bath because he had done a massive toddler colostrum poo and he and his mum were talking about her gardens so he hadn't left yet).
I was stuck on the loo, I couldn't do anything besides rock through the contractions and focus on my breathing as much as possible. I was completely naked, and hadn't planned to birth naked, I had wanted to wear a singlet in the pool but realised there was absolutely no hope of getting back to the bedroom to get anything to wear. The contractions were so intense, and I had a mini freak out that either I was going to freebirth the baby on the toilet, or Jo and Lucy would get here first and I wouldn't be able to let them in because I couldn't get down the hallway. I prayed again, for God to take the negative thoughts away as they were making everything much harder to deal with, and to give me a clear mind to focus on labouring.
After what seemed like forever, but it probably wasn't, I heard DH and DS get home. He came to the bathroom and asked me what was happening. I couldn't speak barely at all, all I managed to say was 'can't speak, fill the pool'. I heard him having difficulty connecting the hose (my DH goes from zero to super-stressed in like no time at all) and when he came back I asked him to breathe because his stress wasn't helping anything! He started trying to ask questions about things that didn't matter - I don't think he got the point that I really couldn't speak and I really couldn't listen to him through contractions because I was using all my energy to focus - all I could keep saying was 'FILL THE POOL'.
Quite soon after DH got home I heard Jo and Lucy arrive. Jo came into the bathroom and asked what was happening, she asked if I was trying not to push. I kind of was, but not big pushes just those little kind of pushes your muscles do at the start. She asked Lucy to start filling pots of water in the bathtub so they could fill the pool with them as well as the hose. Her and DH tag teamed the pots of water and finally the pool was full enough for me to get in. Jo came and got me and helped me get from the bathroom to the pool. As I slid into the water there was instant relief, the whole energy around the labour changed and I started pushing properly with the very next contraction.
I pushed and pushed (it probably wasn't for that long but it sure felt like it) and I said to Jo in between contractions "I know you can't but I wish you could tell me how much longer!" She said "no I can't but if you have a feel you might be able to feel baby's head inside". I put my finger in, but no head. She said "don't worry, your body's just stretching and making room to get the baby out". I kept on pushing. A while later she made a comment about how much amniotic fluid was coming out, I could feel it and I said "I know, it keeps coming and coming but the baby doesn't come!"
She told me it wouldn't be long now and to have another feel. I put my finger in and felt something squishy - surely that couldn't be the head? Jo asked if I felt anything, I said I felt something but I don't know what it was. She said that it should feel soft and kind of squishy, I said that's what I feel and she told me it was the head. I don't think I took my hand away after that, I just kept feeling my baby's head.
It only took another push or two and then there was the ring of fire. Jo said it was a difficult angle for her to see much, and asked me what I was feeling. I told her lots of pressure and burning, a second later I repeated "burning, burning lots of burning!". She told me I was doing well, and it wouldn't be much longer now. DS started to get a little upset at this point, he hadn't been phased until now but I think maybe the tone of my voice changed or something, and it upset him. I looked up and he was next to my head, I gave him a smile and told him I was going to be ok, that it was just like the videos we had watched and the baby would be here soon. He calmed down and I was able to focus again.
Jo told the truth, it wasn't much longer. In the next set of pushes in the following contraction she was able to see the baby's head, and in the very next set the head finally came out. It was such an amazing feeling. I remember having so much determination and holding my muscles mid-push so I could breathe but wouldn't lose any of the work I'd done. Jo told me later that she was impressed she didn't have to coach me through breathing or pushing, that I was able to follow my body's lead and any suggestions she may have had I did naturally.
The shoulders came out with the next push and Jo told me to hold the baby under the head and a shoulder and with the next push to bring the baby up onto my belly. I did this and suddenly I had a baby! The baby didn't breathe or cry straight away so Jo had my blow on its face gently and speak to it and after a few seconds there was a little whimper and baby had taken its first breath. DH came around to stand behind me and saw that it was a baby boy. He was so surprised because he was adamant that we were having a girl. I felt incredible, I had just birthed our beautiful DS2 at home in the water, what an amazing experience!
I sat in the water cuddling my baby, he rooted around and I helped him find my breast where he had a little suckle. DS came around behind me and gave the baby one of his toy cars, he wouldn't let me put it anywhere other than on my chest next to baby's head. After a while Jo asked if I felt strong enough to get out of the pool as she was a little concerned about my bleeding. I said I felt fine to get out so Lucy and DH set the couch up with drop sheets, sheets and blankets. Jo helped me stand up and supported me as I stepped over the side of the pool - I remember all of this happening but I don't think I took my eyes off my baby's face because that's all I remember seeing.
We reclined on the couch wrapped in towels, blankets and love. Baby quickly had his first full feed, latching and feeding like an absolute pro. Jo quickly determined that there was nothing to worry about with the bleeding and said that it all must have come out in one go, and then eased off. Exactly an hour after DS2 had been born I delivered the placenta. The contractions were nowhere near as painful as before and I barely had to push - it sure feels weird coming out though.
Jo asked if we had anything for dinner. I realised that we hadn't as I had meant to go to the shops that morning. DH said he'd call his mum and tell her about the birth and ask if she could pick us something up for tea. I don't like to tell people when I go into labour as I feel it's a very private time so when DH had left her house earlier that day he had just told his mum he had to go because I was out of cough lollies. She had no idea what was going on so she was very surprised by the phone call - DH said she didn't understand what he was trying to tell her for the first few minutes!
While DH was calling his mum Jo got a call from another one of her clients who had gone into labour while I was giving birth. Apparently things were ramping up at her place and Jo was needed! Her and Lucy weighed and measured DS2 and after making sure dinner was coming and they weren't needed anymore they started packing up. Jo told me later that she didn't leave the other clients house until 7am the following day!
Our beautiful son Jensen was born on 31 August 2013 at 4:47pm. His weight was 4.34kg (9lb 5oz), he was 56cm long and his head circumfrence was 38cm. Pre/early labour was approximately 8 hours long, first stage lasted 2 hours 47 minutes, second stage was 1 hour 17 minutes and third stage was exactly 1 hour.
Congratulations! Thanks for sharing your beautiful story. Jensen was on my short list of names for this Bub (before DS vetoed it, as he has every other suggestion I've made, lol).
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The amazing birth of our second baby
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