Oh Charaz, you poor thing! you have had so much to deal with at what should be such an important time in you and your DH's life!

I firmly believe (and other may disagree) that the time surrounding the birth of your children and any decisions regarding your children should be made solely by you and your DH, and with the best interests of your new little familyat the foremost. This includes, who is at the delivery, who is waiting at the delivery suite and what you should name your children.

I had a traumatic birth (72 hours and forceps) and I do not remember the first 2 hours of my sons life either, yet I had a supportive husband and did not have to deal with all of the other pressures that you have.

Finally, I think you need to do what you feel that you need to do, and if that includes changing your baby's name, then that is what you need to do. You have to deal with the decision about your baby's name for the rest of your life. I hope that both you and your husband are able to seek professional help in relation to the depression seperately, and then when you are both strong enough, hopefully together.

I think that if your IL's only concern at the moment is to pressure both of you into their wants, and not be concerned about the welfare of their son's new family, then maybe it is best that you have space from them, and if changing the baby's name to your original choice is going to create that space then I say go for it!

You have definately come to a wonderful place for support, and remember everyone is here to listen and support you! Goodluck with whatever you decide to do.

I will be thinking of you and sending you huge {{hugs}}