The very long birth story of Archie George

[kristi14]

Thankyou for sharing your story, you did such a wonderful job.

Congratulations

[Persephone1]

Thank you for reading ladies, and for your lovely comments. It has given me some clarity to be able to write it all down.

[Cassius2]

thank you so so much for sharing your story xx

What a journey it was for you and Archie, those cascading contractions...wow. I hope that you DH and Archie can have lots and lots of cuddles together for now and forever. I know that you never get that first hour back, and you are so right that having your baby separated from you really creates a disconnect, but from my experience it comes back and the flooding of love that overwhelms you when it happens is just a beautiful, precious moment

[jackrose]

What a story! You have been through a real rollercoaster and have expressed remarkable insight after it all.

The first few days after the birth also left me quite anxious and frightened. I looked at Archie on a number of occasions and thought “I don’t know you. Where did you come from?” I didn’t see him born, and I’ve found myself feeling some disconnect between being pregnant and now having a baby in my arms. The anxiety has dissipated and my attachment to him is great, but my sadness about the birth is still heavy and it will take me a long time to grieve it. I don’t know that I’ll ever stop feeling sadness that I didn’t give him the birth I had hoped for, and most importantly to me, that we spent his first hour apart – him in NICU, me under a GA. My main motivation for wanting a natural, low-intervention and drug-free labour and birth was for that sacred first hour – and it’s gone, forever.

Having said that, I am proud that I was able to give my baby a drug-free birth, and immensely proud that I was able to labour and birth him with minimal intervention. My labour was exactly what I wanted it to be. The birth, whilst traumatic, was exactly what it needed to be for him to arrive safely.

I cannot thank my Doula and my DH enough for the enormous support they’ve given me throughout all of this. If I had one piece of advice for any pregnant woman, it would be to hire a Doula. I wouldn’t be where I am now without her.

I had an emergency CS with my first and felt exactly as you did, a weird sensation of where did you come from and a disassociation between pregnancy and birth. I too felt I had the labour I wanted and worked toward but that the birth left a lot to be desired. I also understand your grief and sadness about loosing that sacred hour, I still tear up when I see photos of my DD in the hours after her birth and before I got to see her, when she should have been with me. That divine newborn time was my main motivation for birth with my second, my focus thorough my pregnancy and labour.

You did such an incredible job delivering your boy into this world and should be very proud of yourself. From making informed decisions to having the best support people with you and doing it all drug free as you wanted. Amazing, considering the dramas that unfolded beyond your control. I really feel that the grief and trauma we can feel about birth is centered around the things that happen out of our control so when you can recognise that as you have it does help work through birth trauma.

And I agree with you, having a doula and great support is such an unbelievable help.

Congratulations to you and your family and welcome to beautiful little Archie, he is a lucky boy to have such a mum!