I'm so sorry you are having such a hard time of it! I am sure she doesn't want to be awake either, and no it isn't normal for all babies.
If you can recognise the vomiting etc, then I would follow the reflux path. Call the ABA and talk to them about what they suggest, I would think it is a paed you will need to speak to, but have a chat to your MCHN too, and tell them you are think she has silent reflux. Clearly she is not happy and not settled, and neither are you, which is never good.

Hopefully you can get her on some sort of antacid, not sure what for bubs so young (DD was 7 months or so when she developed reflux, but it wasn't severe and didn't need medication) I know there are several girls who have had reflux bubs on things like Gaviscon etc. I hope they will come in and share their wisdom with you.

If you do get her down, elevate her head, so stick a rolled up towel under her bassinet mattress or have her in with you with her head on your arm, so she is elevated, may help to ease the reflux a little.