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thread: Breastfeeding out and about.... or in parents rooms?

  1. #37
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    hiding under my desk!
    1,432

    any where everywhere..even while walking around shopping

  2. #38
    Registered User

    Mar 2005
    Darwin, NT
    357

    Hi Renstar,

    Firstly can I say that your bubby is absolutely GORGEOUS! You must be so proud!

    Secondly, to the issue of bfing in public. I bf anywhere, anytime. I have a lovely sling that allows me to feed one handed, so I can shop...tend to kids...you name it, I can do it at the same time. A person would have no idea that i am feeding.....unless they came a looked closely.

    I do see MANY women up here in the NT bfing in public, all of them differently - some discreetly, and others not so. After being confronted many times in Qld about my preference for public bfing with baby #1 (once at a private party!).....I was relieved to move back to the NT where it is common place to see indigenous women with a child on hip helping itself to a meal. Personally I found Qld to be FAR more conservative and old fashioned in comparison to the NT.

    My favourite memory of moving back to the NT was standing in line at the bottle shop, and in the next line was an indigenous woman with a 1ish year old on hip, who reached into her mother's slip dress and pulled out her breast, and promptly began feeding. I thought "Honey, Qld as a state could learn much from you!"

    I certainly would not bare my entire breast in public to feed my baby, but I have seen many women do so at shops etc. I have a good friend that prefers this mode of feeding, and have had lunch at a restaurant with her when she did exactly this to feed her baby. No one even blinked an eyelid.

  3. #39
    Registered User

    Oct 2004
    Sydney
    2,614

    I'm not breastfeeeding any more as mt daughter weaned herself, but when I was breastfeeding, I would just feed anywhere. I would feed sitting on a chair in the middle of the shopping centre, in the chemist, walking through the supermarket, in the library, waiting in line at the bank or post office... and I never bothered to cover up either. I did it discreetly and I dont have big breasts, and if people dont like seeing a baby being breastfed, they dont have to look. I remember being in Target when Claire was about 2 weeks old and my MIL was with me, she kept trying to get me to cover myself with a muslin wrap, and I kept taking it off because I didnt want to hide under the wrap.
    I never really got any nasty comments. People would look as they walked past, other mums would smile sometimes. One mum walked past and said 'good on you' or something to that effect.
    At my local (Very small) shopping centre, the parent room is so pathetic. There is barely enough room to even sit down in there. I used the room one to change a nappy, but never again because it was really bad. The big shopping centre near me has 2 biggish parent rooms which I have used before but they are in inconvenient locations so I dont use them much unless Claire has a really nasty nappy to change.

  4. #40
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,979

    Butterfly - aww thanks heaps Yes I am very proud indeed Your little guy is so gorgeous too! What a cutie!! Nawww.....! That's awesome you can BF with baby in sling. i haven't mastered that yet.... DD is a bit too big for that now it feels but next baby I will give it a go hehe

    well done to you girls who breastfeed while walking around the shops! That's sooo good!!!

  5. #41
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    In my own private paradise
    15,272

    i surprised myself the first time i bf in public - i am VERY self conscious about my body but it needed to be done so i did it - my baby was upset, she wanted a drink and i wasn't even going to try to find room at the parents room! decent size shopping centre, two chairs... ummmm nope, doesn't add up - esp on the second day of the big w sale in the middle of school holidays! i was discreet now that we have bf down pat - wouldn't have done it in the early days cos i too have big boobs and wasn't comfy flashing everyone! only a couple of days ago i had to feed her twice on a three hour shopping trip. growth spurts suck! lol

    i've only been in two parents rooms and both were really nice and VERY clean. i was surprised to be honest. i was expecting a dodgy little space and only went in there cos i needed to change DD - but the first was really nice - leather lounge seats in each cubicle and all. the second was again really nice and comfy - cain chairs, comfy to sit in etc. i now know what to expect of the "right" kind of parents room - if i go to one that isn't up to that standard, i'll change DD's backside then head out to feed her!



    If there is a decent parents room available and I am not in the middle of something else (like say - lunch) then I will use it because it means the seats are more comfy. I dislike the ones with little cubicles and curtains (although I understand some women prefer to be that hidden) but its like saying we shouldn't even bf in front of other bfing mothers!
    not meaning to offend anyone, but a parents room isn't JUST for breastfeeding mothers. last week my DH was with me and came into the parents room. there was another father there as well. having the option of closing the curtains to give you privacy is a damn good idea. some people wouldn't care about being seen, but others would. and it's also respectful to any fathers that may need to use the room - THEY may not be comfy - esp if, ,like some of us have posted, you have to flash more of yourself cos you have attachment issues or a beak of a baby. come to think of it, DH has been with me both times i've used the parents room. so yeah, i can see a good reason! there are also cultural reasons why some women wouldn't want another woman to see them exposed...

  6. #42
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Taking a ride on my grdonkey :D
    2,716

    ^ I shut the sliding door when I'm using the little room for BFing too - partly to keep DD1 close at hand, and partly because I know there are women out there who use the parents' room to use the toilet when they have kids in tow, or to change their child's nappy, and sadly there are PLENTY of women who use the parents' room for this purpose who would strongly object to their children being 'subjected' to the sight of a BFing mum. Which again, is their issue and not mine, but it's still sad that so many people have issues when it comes to breastfeeding and things like, 'I shouldn't have to explain that kind of stuff to my kids, they're too young'... :/

  7. #43
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Melbourne
    3,244

    i love seeing BFing mums out & about, i think it's awesome.

    for me, i'm feeling really nervous about the first time we go out with DS & i need to feed him. like a couple of other posters, i have really big breasts & i'm really not sure how i'm going to go about flashing not only a whole boob but also how i'm going to manage the 'football' hold while i'm doing it! i think i should have done some research into the parents rooms at the local shopping centre while i was still PG!

    tomorrow will be my first outing (but only to DP's mum's) & i will need to feed while i'm there. i think i prefer the idea of being in a room by myself at the moment as we're still getting the hang of BFing but i hope to become more & more comfortable as it gets better established and i relax a bit.

  8. #44
    Registered User

    Mar 2008
    North Northcote
    8,065

    good luck tomorrow Sloane! i reckon you never forget your first public b/f! (at least i know i won't - sipping a decaf latte in the middle of the canberra centre - i was, in fact, secretly pooping my pants though LOL!).

  9. #45
    Registered User

    Nov 2007
    Melbourne
    220

    i feel comfortable using parent rooms... especially for the first 2 months. Not only am i & bub still learning, but for the excessively amount of let down and leaks i get from the other boob not being fed on. I also used nipple shields to let my nipples heal (tongue tie bub) and they can't exactly be used indiscreet at all! LOL! Ive got big boobs and it makes it hard considering all the baby feeding singlets are made for smaller cup/bust sized women.

    Saying that ive Bf-ed out in public and never had a bad comment or bad look (rather distracted or 2 busy in another world to notice) However the biggest knee-jerk reaction i had was Bfing in the parent room, but the curtains were pulled shut (i assumed they were being used unlike the cleaners & others lol) i used a comfy chair in the parent room opposite the nappy change tables a hubby came in (his wife was changing a tot) saw me, took a double take "whoah!" and quickly went back out the door!

  10. #46
    Registered User

    Nov 2007
    Melbourne
    220

    ^ I shut the sliding door when I'm using the little room for BFing too - partly to keep DD1 close at hand, and partly because I know there are women out there who use the parents' room to use the toilet when they have kids in tow, or to change their child's nappy, and sadly there are PLENTY of women who use the parents' room for this purpose who would strongly object to their children being 'subjected' to the sight of a BFing mum. Which again, is their issue and not mine, but it's still sad that so many people have issues when it comes to breastfeeding and things like, 'I shouldn't have to explain that kind of stuff to my kids, they're too young'... :/
    i should scan a picture my DD drew at school in class of me. From memory it was me feeding the baby, side view with a arm and a massive big boob!!!!!!!!!!!! It had me thinking what she was telling the kids at her table and what her teacher said.

  11. #47
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Taking a ride on my grdonkey :D
    2,716

    ^ Lol aww how cute Good on her for doing her small bit to educate the next generation of BFers!!! DD1 often tries to give her dolly 'booby feeds' when I'm feeding DD2, and today she was snuggling on the couch with her arm around the baby and she pulled up her shirt and pushed bub's head to her belly, telling her, 'Come on, booby-time!'

    I just rolled around laughing, but I'm proud of her - hopefully she keeps thinking BFing is a totally normal everyday practice and can go on to BF her own babies if she ever has them!

  12. #48
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,979

    ^ I shut the sliding door when I'm using the little room for BFing too - partly to keep DD1 close at hand, and partly because I know there are women out there who use the parents' room to use the toilet when they have kids in tow, or to change their child's nappy, and sadly there are PLENTY of women who use the parents' room for this purpose who would strongly object to their children being 'subjected' to the sight of a BFing mum. Which again, is their issue and not mine, but it's still sad that so many people have issues when it comes to breastfeeding and things like, 'I shouldn't have to explain that kind of stuff to my kids, they're too young'... :/

    Awwww I find that so sad.... I WANT my kids to see other mum's breastfeeding their babies as they grow up and I'll be one of those Mum's who will point out a breastfeeding mother and say "she is feeding her baby". It's NORMAL. Why can't people get that.... LOL it's nothing to be frowned upon.

    Sloane - good luck tomorrow hun!!! You will be fine You'll feel so proud of yourself once you have BF out and about the first time! Even if it's in the parents room. Do it where you feel most comfortable at the time. My first BF out and about was in a parents room but it stunk like POO!!! but i was having BIG problems with attachment at the time and no way was i able to BF in front of public etc.... noooo way. I was so awkward. And ikwym re: football hold.... at one stage I was having to feed my DD football hold on the L side only as she wouldnt feed in cradle position on that side!!! But as of 4mths, she does now!!! Finally!!!!

  13. #49

    Dec 2007
    Australia
    1,095

    One of the most awkward BFing experiences is when I'm with my family (most recently, ILs) with my nearly 2 year old playing with my nipples. She screams her head off if I put them away so what do I do?! I always breastfeed in public, though I think parents rooms are great for those who want/need them. They're certainly a great help if you have a fussy bub or a newborn or are having other feeding difficulties.

  14. #50
    BellyBelly Life Member - Love all your MCN friends
    Add Gigi on Facebook

    Jun 2004
    The Festival State
    3,008

    Ive got big boobs and it makes it hard considering all the baby feeding singlets are made for smaller cup/bust sized women.
    i have a friend who is larger busted than me, and both of us have bought the "Almost Mum" breastfeeding tops to feed in. ($30 each) You wear your normal maternity bra underneath, the top covers your stomach, and the top bit (where your boobs are) has a double layer. when you go to feed, you pull aside a bit, there is a hole there so baby can access your nipple.

    So that's another way to bf in public, feeling a bit more covered up.

    i'm feeding a 2.5yo in public, and dealing with the "are you STILL feeding" comments, so covering up has become much more important to me, the longer i feed. I wish i had these tops EARLIER though, cos i've always felt so self conscious of my belly showing when i fed by lifting my normal tshirt, from the bottom.

    Nuvo Maternity has some styles that are generous in size too, not the polo tops, they are a small make, but the other styles, like the flowy ones made out of more "jersey" type fabric are generous in sizing. I wear a medium in those, so if you have larger bust, maybe their L or XL might suit. They have regular sales, so worth joining their newsletter. The hoody style is very comfy.

    i would happily put links (so you can find it easily) if i was allowed to (on this forum).

    i found these two sites i've mentioned, more affordable than lots of other bf-ing wear shops on line.

    Being dressed, to be able to feed easily anywhere, anytime, has made bf-ing easier for me. i used to think it was all a waste of money, until i realised, how annoyed i felt, each time i went to feed, feeling self consious. Also, i delayed buying bf-ing clothing, cos i didn't know how long i could keep it up (ddin't want to buy it only to get a few months wear out of it). little did i know we'd still be doing it two years later LOL.

  15. #51

    Nov 2007
    Earth
    4,434

    Obviously I have no experience in bfing - although I like to think I'd do it loud and proud when its my turn But I thought I would say that I have been to a fair few parents rooms with my sister and her bub, and I am shocked at how hot they are! There never seems to be airconditioning, and if I have a problem with it, chances are bubs have a problem too! It would make me MORE determined not to feed in there...

  16. #52
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Victoria
    7,260

    A bump hugger is also a great idea, even thought you dont have a baby bump anymore lol
    You can get them at the huggalugs website

  17. #53
    BellyBelly Member

    Jul 2008
    Yarra Valley, Victoria
    429

    Hi All,

    Usually I feed just wherever I can find a seat - couch, cafe, whatever. DD is starting to get a bit distracted during feeding (she pulls off to gaze adoringly at me and give me milky smiles. I have to try to not look at her whilst she's doing this otherwise she would spend 45+ at each boob. Very hard to ignore though! ). So yesterday I decided to feed in the parents room at Chirnside Park shopping centre (in Vic). It's a nice parents room, but as I have never used one before, I felt really weird.

    I felt like being in there meant I had something to hide, that what I was doing was not fit for public consumption - it was just a feeling, but not one I expected to feel at all. So I think unless DD is very vey distracted, I'll be back to the cafe/couch/wherever.

    I'm completely ok though with people who are not comfortable feeding in public...

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