Hi,

NaeNae, I know you have had some problems with breastfeeding and you've done a fabulous job with your little one.
Tell me, how many feeds does your baby have in 24hrs now? What have her weightgains been like lately?
Babies are hardwired to suck. When they suck they get food (obviously) but they also get an amazing mix of hormones which helps them relax, helps them sleep and helps them to digest their food. For all these reasons, plus their connection with mum, they love sucking. I often here mums saying "she uses me as a dummy' when it fact it's clear that they are using the dummy as a substitute for mummy!
Babies generally need to feed 8-12 times in 24hours (this is often not understood, even by health professionals) and sometimes mums find themselves being pressured to feed only 5-6 times in 24hrs. This is generally not enough for babies to thrive on. In the early days, after the birth of your baby, your milk supply id driven by the high levels of prolactin in your body. At this time most mothers relatively over supply for their babies. Over time (there is no defined amount of time - it varies) prolactin levels return to a fairly normal level - but they peak every time you breastfeed your baby. So your milk supply is controlled by your baby's sucking, and emptying the breast. The more you feed - the more milk you make - it's almost always as simple as that.
So, this is a longwinded way around your questions (but I think it helps to understand the theory behind the information you are given.) A dummy can be a very useful and helpful tool, used after a feed to help comfort a baby. Often, as you identify, they don't really want another tummy of milk, but a little extra sucking helps them to relax and go to sleep. But, a dummy shouldn't be used to "hold off a feed" - to "space feeds out" for an arbitary amount of time - say, 3-4 hours. There will be times of the day - usually late afternoon til early evening - where babies seem *super* unsettled - nothing we do as mothers seems to make it right for them. Very hard on a mother's nerves. Babies tend to want a cluster of feeds during that time, and it's good to go with it. But, if they will accept a dummy after they've had a good feed it can give the mum a bit of respite.
The first 6 weeks with a new baby are hell, really (when you look back) The learning curve is so steep it makes Everest look like a Sunday stroll in the gardens.
If you keep in mind the principle of "supply + demand" and understand a little of how milk production works and - and how babies work - you will be fine. Keep asking for information and support when you need it.