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thread: how did u decide ?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jul 2009
    1,973

    how did u decide ?

    There may already be a thread on this ,sorry if there is.

    I just want to know how you decided how long to breastfeed for?
    Before i had DD i had all these things in mind that i would only Bfeed her for this amount of time etc, but now that she is here i am loving it and i cant imagine not feeding her, the connection is amazing the way she looks up at me and smiles and how she gets excited noises when she knows im about to feed her lol soo cute.

    So how did you decide ?

  2. #2
    Registered User

    May 2009
    Adelaide
    201

    I think alot of mums have this roughly set time limit in their minds before their bub arrives.. but then when baby comes & it becomes such a normal thing to do, they become so used to it, they dont notice the time go by and will often feed for longer than they had originally thought they would.

    I fed my first son for 8months but had to stop cos I had my tonsils out and was in hospital very sick so had to rely on other people to help look after him. So feeding him became too hard with how sick I got. I had always thought (during pregnancy) I would only feed for 6ish months but I know if I hadn't got sick I would have kept going till probably 12-18months cos I enjoyed feeding him so much.

    It's such a special time that goes so fast, take your time to decide and if you dont want to stop, then dont! My sister's bub just turned 13 months and people keep asking her about weaning as she is now over 1.. but she's not ready to stop just yet so I told her to ignore what people say or 'suggest'.

    This time around, Im going to feed bub until Im ready or he is ready to stop, probably 12-18months but Im not going to put limits on it

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    Melbourne
    867

    I think just feed your baby girl as long and it feels right for you. That might be 3 months, it might be 12 months it might be 3 years. Every Mummy/Baby partnership is different and sometimes Mums decide when they stop and sometimes it's the bub who makes the decision. Don't be swayed by what people say is the "appropriate" time to finish up this special and unique bond you have with your bub. It's entirely your decision and one you both need to feel happy, ready and comfortable about.

    It is an amazingly beautiful time in both your lives and one which will fly by. Seeing your baby look up at you over your breast with pure love in their eyes is simply one the most wonderous experiences. Your little girl will be grown up before you know it and this special bond together can never be repeated.

  4. #4
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    To start with, I wanted to feed for 12 months, to avoid any hassle with formula mostly. But once we got into it and it got easier, I really couldn't see any reason to stop. My goal changed - I wanted to let my DS decide when he was ready to stop.

    I think, at the end of the day, you don't have to 'decide' on a time limit. It's only if something comes up that prevents you from continuing, or if your child decides they want to stop, kwim?

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jun 2006
    In the middle of Pink and Blue!!!
    921

    I fed my first son for about 15 months, i had NO idea how long i should feed for or how long i wanted to feed for, the TIME WAS RIGHT!!!!! he was waking heaps during the night just to have a few sucks and back to sleep and i felt within myself that i was ready!!!!! You will just know when the right time is!!!!

  6. #6
    Registered User
    Add ~clover~ on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    travelling
    9,557

    I wanted to feed my 2 oldest for about 6 months. I had trouble & didn't make it with either til past 6 weeks. When DS came along, I wasn't worried. I wanted to make my minumum 6 months, but thats all I thought about. If I hadn't fallen pregnant again he'd still probably be feeding. He was only a few weeks off 2 when I stopped him, coz the pregnancy hormones made it hurt too much to keep going.
    Most people I know stop either due to work, health or pregnancies. I don't think I know anyone who set a limit & said thats it when the time came.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Sep 2005
    In the middle of nowhere
    9,362

    At first for me it was about getting through the day - just one more day. Then when I got to six weeks I thought I'd get to 12. Then to 6months, then after that I think I stopped worrying and just let her go. She weaned herself at nearly 16months.
    With DS well he's just gone from 3 to 8 (!!!!) feeds a day so he's showing no sign of slowing, and TBH I'm not really fussed.

    I know a few girls who have said that they were only going to 12months and then on the day of their child's birthdays they started with milk and no BFs. I think that's a terrible way to end it, but that's just MO.
    I think active and positive encouragement has a lot to do with it too. I had no ideals before I had DD and when i found it tough got lots of positive encouragement here, whereas the only positive encouragement IRL was DH.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    The Purple House, Sydney
    1,811

    With ds, my aim was 6 months, maybe 12 if I could manage it. We had problems at first, but then it was just so easy and enjoyable, and formula is so expensive. I didn't see the point of stopping. Ds fed for 14 months.

    With dd, I haven't even considered stopping. It's easy, it's free, it's good for her. Not a difficult desicion for me.

    As you can probably tell, cost was a huge deciding factor for me No way I was paying up to $50 a week for formula when boobie is free.

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Member

    Sep 2007
    799

    I was aiming to get to 12months, but let DD take the lead. I thought she was weaning at 7months and was quite upset at the thought, but I think it was because I had my first period and I read somewhere that the related hormones can change the taste so i think she was just being fussy because of that because the week after, she was back to feeding normally.

    She ended up weaning herself at 11months or so - we'd introduced a formula bottle as her last feed, because I coudln't express enough to cover a feed whilst I was at work, and then she slowly dropped her day feeds herself because she was too active to sit still.

    As the pp's have said, just go with the flow, especially if you're enjoying it and its still working, but don't beat yourself up if you don't make your target.

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Sep 2009
    Melbourne
    1,164

    I've always thought to myself I'll BF for 12-18 months and take it from there. It would be nice if he starts cutting back by the end of the year as I'd love to finish off a few extra units at uni and I get lazy with expressing but if it needs to be done I'll do it. I think I'd gently encourage weaning at 2. I thought I'd hate breastfeeding but it's turned out to be a wonderful journey and I very much enjoy the special bond I have with DS. I think one of the most important factors in long term breastfeeding is a supportive partner/family. I'm lucky to have both, they always encourage me to feed for as long as DS needs.

  11. #11
    Life Subscriber

    Jul 2006
    Brisbane
    6,683

    When I was pg with DS1, I wanted to feed for 6 - 12 months because that's when I thought babies were supposed to be fed until. Along the way I found out that the WHO recommends feeding till at least 2, and that there are a lot of physical and emotional reasons to allow babies/toddlers to feed until they want to stop. So my goal became at least 2 years. Sadly I didn't make that either time, but both boys did choose their own time to stop so I have to be happy with that.

    GL with it hun. As others have said, I don't think it's something that you need to plan in advance, but more something that happens - either you or your baby just know the time is right or isn't right to stop!

  12. #12
    Registered User
    Add Shades on Facebook

    May 2008
    Capalaba, QLD
    1,243

    I figured if I managed to BF I'd try to do it for the WHO recommended 2 yrs, longer if DS is willing, up to whenever it doesn't feel right/DS weans himself... I'm hoping this will end up being somewhere between 3 and 4 years.

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Melbourne
    3,244

    while i was PG, i wanted to BF for 12 months. once DS arrived, i thought i'd be happy if i made it through another day! then i changed to aim for 3 months...then 6, now it's back to 12 months as a rough 'minimum'. i'm not sure how i'll go stopping though - my DS still LOVES his BFs & feeds pretty much 2 hourly around the clock.

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Nov 2005
    Sunshine Coast
    1,142

    How did I decide - BellyBelly.

    While I was pg, I read alot of bf threads and learnt about the WHO 2 year recommendation, and I saw a number of people who bf over 12mths, I guess normalising it for me.


    DS1 weaned at 2y 5mths.

  15. #15
    Registered User
    Follow Early Kids On Twitter

    Oct 2007
    Eastern Wheatbelt WA
    3,282

    When I was pregnant with Brendan I wanted to breastfeed, I never questioned as to why I wouldn't be able to. When he arrived early, that was our first struggle. Then there was the reflux and the weak suck and later on his severe tongue-tie was picked up. Brendan was never able to attach without a nipple shield and I hated it. Anyway I expressed for him, which for me just isn't the same, just as good for him, but not the same.

    Before getting pregnant again I gathered bits of information, so that when the time came again I knew better. All I wanted was to give it a better shot, to get bub attached and feed from me. My aim was to feed longer than Brendan, so 6 months. When Tristan was born early I was determined to feed him, the nurses and Dr's shot me down saying it wasn't worth even trying until he was a week old. We did try on day 2 and he took to it like a champ that by beginning of day 4 he was on all suck feeds, albeit by nipple shield, he was still breastfeeding. He was on all breastfeeds by day 6 when they transferred us for rooming in at me local hospital. He is now 10 (and a bit) months and I don't plan on giving up yet. I don't think he does either

    I know that one day it will end, but not until we are both ready for it.

  16. #16
    2013 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    May 2007
    Brisbane
    5,310

    I had always told myself that breastfeeding beyond a year was weird, so my limit was 12 months.

    She's now almost 21 months, and we are really happy to continue. I'm happy for her to self-wean, which I think she's doing. We're down to one or two feeds a day.
    After the initial period of ouchies, plus mastitis when she was 4 months old, and some biting this time last year, we had a fairly smooth run. I was pretty lucky to have a lot of support from my parents and from my partner. If I hadn't had the support I think I wouldn't have lasted very long.

  17. #17
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    summer street
    2,708

    I would like to get to 2 years. When I was pg I though twelve months at the very least. I love breastfeeding and dd is a boobaholic so we're going strong.

    I have started to get the 'when are you weaning' comments, but I usually joke and say when she's 7!

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    In my own private paradise
    15,272

    initially my aim was to feed - i was determined to feed for ANY amount of time - i didn't have an endate in mind. once we got past some initial hurdles, i started looking at 6months as minimum goal. when we got close to then, it was so natural, i didn't even think about stopping - i'm now of the opinion that she'll wean when she's ready. provided it's not detrimental to either of us, we'll keep going. it's so convenient (and like Lolli mentioned, CHEAP!)

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