I too am sorry for your experience. I do agree with MantaRay though that like most things, the majority of the time everything is fine, but it will never be 100% of the time that exactly the same thing will happen for everyone. I think you're a good example of that. When I said ' Everyone has excess milk' I meant as a humurous response to Renstar wondering if she would have more milk than she needed.
But when I say that having the bottles and formula there is a psychological temptation at a time when you're tired and sore, I'm not making it up. Many times, I too felt the very real pull of wanting to give up BFing, despite the fact that I had BFed before and knew I could do it. It may have been the opposite for you, but in MOST cases, it is true. As a new mum, it's a very real alternative when you're frazzled, in pain and sleep-deprived. It can ultimately also mean the difference between ending up FF when you were otherwise able to BF.
I too don't think you should go into a BFing relationship worrying that you will have low supply, though I do know it does happen (as it did to you). It just doesn't happen very often. And again, it's like buying crutches in case your leg breaks. Some people's legs may well break, but for most, it just doesn't happen.
So not disagreeing with you, just pointing out that for someone who wants to BF, is able to BF and does not wish to bottlefeed, there is no need to buy bottles prior to baby arriving.
Last edited by sushee; September 5th, 2008 at 06:14 PM.
the simple truth is, the majority of women can breastfeed. Even if it hurts, even if they bleed (I did), even if they don't enjoy it, they can breastfeed if a) they want to and b) they get the right support (most importantly).
But for the small minority that can't, that's why they have bottles and formula. And in most places, you can buy these items from any pharmacy, and in most metro cities, you can find a pharmacy open 24 hours a day if you look.
The other thing I wanted to say is this: breastfeeding is not easy for many women. Just because I BFed 4 kids didn't mean it was easy. I had recurrent mastitis, cracked nipples, bleeding. No, definitely not easy. Many BFing mums will agree - BFing is hard, it takes time to establish and is more often than not quite painful to begin with. But in the long term it is very rewarding, and completely worth the difficult start. Just wanted to clarify that I never said it would be easy.
Last edited by sushee; September 5th, 2008 at 06:27 PM.
Renstar your a champ, I will make sure they are on my fridge before bub arrives, too.
Sushee. You are right about the support, that was a vital missing link for me. As well as a MIL who keep wanting to help by continuously suggesting formula ( before the probs even started) and a small country town where chemists dont open past 1pm on a Saturday (let alone Sundays, P.hols or 24 hrs)
myson, I also second what MantaRay said about the IBCLC lactation consultant. I saw a private LC and it was worth far more than the $90 I paid. It saved our breastfeeding relationship. At 8 weeks I nearly gave up with breast refusal issues, I couldn't get in touch with any ABA councellors in our area as it was Christmas time and 2 were on holidays and the other was moving house! My baby had breast refusal and I was in tears daily... I found a LC and it was fabulous.
Its absolutely demoralising when you want to do something & its not working. I hope you and Ren get set up for support beforehand. The ABA has meetings for pregnant mum's as well to help you get support beforehand
Hi Myson! Sounds like you had a rough start and I can understand your frustration. A very close friend of mine had a similar situation with her first and went on to have PLENTY of milk with her second. To the point that her freezer is now overflowing with frozen EBM! And her daughter is 3 months old. Bad experiences happen, and they are something we can learn from. I had a bad time first time around too and went on to BF my son till he weaned at 12 months and it was bliss! Definitely enroll in whatever you can, get some books and try and find yourself a friend or mother who has successfully breastfed so that you can have someone around to help if you need it. I was with my gf during the early stages and there were a few things I didn't even know I knew that came in handy.
I can understand where myson is coming from. I went into BF'ing knowing it wouldn't be easy but never expecting I'd have any problems. DS had perfect attachment, never had cracked nipples, etc but he wasn't gaining enough weight. First thing suggested was low supply so off I went to buy a pump (yes, called ABA about pump hire and no one ever got back to me - very disappointed about this) to express, took fenugreek, motillium, akivite, lactation cookies to boost supply. Saw 3 different LC's where they finally worked out DS has a weak suck which made sense since I only ended up with blocked ducts because DS wasn't draining my breast.
I guess the point I am getting at is I have learnt that breastfeeding is a partnership between you and bub and needs both of you to work together and if one partner isn't doing the job, then the partnership suffers. I did everything I could for my supply, it was up to DS to take it. He is still learning to suck properly. I am determined to keep breastfeeding even though it is so tempting to let it go.
Renstar, just know that you CAN breastfeed and there is a multitude of support with your midwives, LC's, ABA and all of us here at BB I don't think it matters if you have bottles on hand or not because it comes down to what you feel and believe in your head and heart. And you deal with the problems as they arise and you will get through them. We all have.
Renstar, the thing to remember is that if you need to use the numbers, make sure you do so! So many people hang around thinking things will just magically get better.
I agree with MR and Sushee.........jsut concentrate on getting the BFing thing down pat before you go worrying about expressing and especially bottles. I know it all sounds so exciting now LOL but really, learning to care for a newborn is enough without expressing if you don't really have to. I'm sure you will find the ABA class invaluable, hope you enjoy it!
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I don't think it matters if you have bottles on hand or not because it comes down to what you feel and believe in your head and heart. And you deal with the problems as they arise and you will get through them. We all have.
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