My beautiful girl was born full term and slightly jaundiced in a private hospital. We were moved out of hospital and into a hotel suite within 26 hours of her birth. The midwives would come in and out and all offer different advice on feeding and attachment, and none of them stayed to watch an entire feed from start to finish.
When I left the hotel I was not sure about feeding and did not think that my milk had come in. I was informed that it had and not to worry about it. I was also concerned that my baby was nrealy always asleep and would not stay awake for feeding - again I was advised not to worry.
7 days after she was born my milk actually came in. This was 3 days after I had returned home. Despite my fears about my sleeping baby who didn't feed properly everyone said she was fine, including the local maternal child nurse.
10 days after she was born my baby was admitted to the Royal Children's Hospital in the neo-natal ward for what they described as "silent starving". She had not been feeding all that time and my milk had disappeared. She was treated for jaundice and then given feeding tubes. I dealt with a lactation consultant to try and get my milk back, and luckily it worked. After 4 really hard days in hospital, my baby and I returned home and this time she actually was feeding.
If one person had actually sat with me for an entire feed, they would have seen that my girl was not feeding, very drowsy and attachment per se was not the problem. I have never felt more upset in my entire life and a complete failure.
My girl is now 8 months old and thriving - more by my good judgment in a fog of sleeplessness that something was wrong.
I also felt a complete lack of support for feeding from my parents and their friends. As we were all bottle fed, they find breastfeeding too primal and public. My father still leaves the room and my mother is embarrassed.
Baby is now great and we are now feeding once at night after her dinner and bath, when I am home from work.