hun. I don't really have any good advice cause I'm not in that situation. It does sound like she's making up for lost time from when you are at work. So even though she's fine with Shel, once you're around she remembers what she's missed and asks for it constantly! She probably does consider feeding to be 'quality' time with you too, although I completely get where you're coming from. It would be trying.

Is she old enough to start saying that bbies only make milk in the mornings and evenings? So you only have milk when she wakes up and before she goes to bed at night? I dunno. Whatever you decide to do, consistency will be important. Have you called the ABA? They might have some good ideas too.

Hope it sorts itself out soon in a way you can both be happy with.