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Thread: Have decided to wean our toddler - could use a little moral support

  1. #19

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    No advice Suse but I hope he adjusts soon.


  2. #20
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    feeb is offline Thankful for the kindness of my 2012 RAK making me Life member

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    Hugs sounds like you have made the right decision for your DS, you are very brave I hope its not to painful for you.

    I have a boobie obsessed 2 year old whom I hope weans himself as no idea how I will do it.

    Good luck

  3. #21

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    I understand what you're saying, Suse. When my DD was not much older than your DS I stopped the night time feed before bed too. She doesn't have any particular challenges getting to sleep, but she was using that feed as an excuse to draw out the bedtime routine no end. I have to admit to replacing it once or twice when she did get a little upset with a small drink of chocolate milk, but it wasn't something we did more than a couple of times. I totally get that the night time feed can become more trouble than it's worth and not so much about bfing. Another thing I did was if she was genuinely tired and a bit needy was offer her a cuddle on the couch while DP and I watched TV quietly. I only did it if I sensed she'd fall asleep in five mins. I still do sometimes, much better than night time tantrums in our house!

    We kept going with a morning bf for another 9 mths, so it wasn't complete weaning, but it wasn't as difficult to drop as I'd thought.

    GL hun, you and DS have had a fabulous bfing relationship! Well done to you.

  4. #22

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    Just wanted to thank you all for such wonderful support - it means so much So far we've not been doing too badly, E has asked for boobies only at times when he is most tired or stressed, but has accepted not getting them incredibly well. Still haven't managed to get him to sleep yet, but he'll either never sleep again (LOL), or he will sleep eventually.

    Santosha - just wanted to ask - what are social stories? We've only just got E's diagnosis so we haven't had any support/intervention yet, so many of the ASD techniques are still a mystery to us. Hopefully it won't be too long for him to get in a program (although it's likely to be next year), he's doing really well considering that his parents are figuring out how best to respond to him by instinct (said a little tongue in cheek, because instinct is often the best thing, but we do feel like we are flying by the seat of our pants and have no idea whatsoever)

  5. #23

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    Quote Originally Posted by suse View Post
    Still haven't managed to get him to sleep yet, but he'll either never sleep again (LOL), or he will sleep eventually.
    I remember saying the exact same thing to myself - hope it's the latter.

  6. #24

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    Suse - a social story is a little book you can construct yourself using photos, clipart or any pics that are simple and meaningful to your little guy. It gives the basic story about what is happening, or is going to happen in a certain situations, and can be read together repeatedly so that the info can be learnt through repetition and visual representation - two things that are really helpful to kids on the spectrum. It can help make life more predictable and therefore less anxiety provoking, and help to mentally rehearse desired behaviours or solutions to problems. You can tailor it to suit the language you use, at the level your child can understand. Just as an example, your social story might say: 'Boobie milk is for babies and little children (pic of baby breastfeeding). DS is a big boy now. DS can drink milk from a cup (pic of Ds's boobie alternative!). Mummy says 'no more boobies for Ds' (put what you usually say in response to a request for a feed, then say this verbatim in response every time, so it echoes what he has read in his story). If Ds feels sad he gives Mummy or Daddy a cuddle, he can give Teddy a cuddle, he can have a drink of X (list and depict what is soothing and calming for your DS). After a big cuddle (or whatever you list) DS feels much better and is ready to go and play (pic of him doing something he loves that you can use to distract and help him move on).

    I'd tend to write a separate social story about bed time, explaining and depicting the new routine you want to have in place with no mention of boobie so it doesn't trigger him thinking about it unnecessarily.

    Hmmm... Hoping my explation makes sense. Typing this out on iPod with DD asleep in my chest! There is an art to writing a good social story and a reccomended formula around having X number of descriptions, X number of behavioural directions and the importance of the story having an outcome or consequence for the new behaviour. However... I figure if it works for you and your son, it's a good social story!! If you want more info, google Carol Gray, social stories.

    All the very best for successful weaning and for accessing EI services. I hope the wait is not too long. I work in EI with kids on the spectrum and am more than happy to answer any questions you might have while you wait - just PM me.

  7. #25

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    That's more than brilliant - thank you so much Santosha!

  8. #26

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    I'm glad it's going well so far Suse, it must make you feel a lot better about the decision to do it

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