It hurts!!

[~clover~]

You are doing so great!
It WILL get better! It takes practise. It honestly took 6 weeks for me to work it out & you are way ahead of me already!
Have you tried the lansinoh? Might be worth a shot?

[Janie]

SJ, you are doing great hun! But don't put too much pressure on yourself, these are very early days yet!!!! Most people take about 6 weeks to get into the swing of things, and some even take longer (and that can be regardless of how they feed their baby). Just take it a day at a time. I promise that one day things will be easier, and you'll be more comfortable with BFing.

IRT the attachment and pain thing.........is it possible that things were looking good when the LC watched you, but they're not always like that? Maybe it was one of the good feeds? If the crack doesn't heal soon I would look again at getting your positioning and attachment checked, in case there is something there that isn't immediately obvious. I would hate to think you were battling on with a crack, and pain, when it's not necessary. Do you detach Grace, and then reattach if it's too sore? Does it help if you do that, can you get her in a less painful position? Cracked nipples are certainly the result of poor attachment, but it will still be sensitive as things are healing so it's hard to know right now what exactly is going on.

Hope you're feeling better soon hun

[Arcadia]

Oh its so hard in the beginning isn't it...what with the recovery, uterine pains, lochia, fatigue and now an infection poor you!!!

I just want to reassure you, you're experience sounds EXACTLY like my BF journey its unbelievable. But by about 5-6 weeks, DD was self attaching and I could walk around the house...it DOES get easier if you keep practicing.

When you say "stingy" do your nipples look white at the tips? Does it hurt more when you're cold, like when you just get out of the shower?

You could have a mild case of vasospasm...which I had at the start too. It is when the blood flow to the nipple is constricted. It can be because of various things, but poor attachment is one of them. Now I had 'perfect' attachment and STILL had vasospasm and a divet in my left nipple (like you).
I also had the lipstick effect on the left nipple.

I realise now DD was slipping off the nipple to cope with the flow because the letdown on the left is faster. Have you tried leaning back a little at the start of a feed to slow the flow (just remember to sit foward at the end to empty the breast).

I think you have to take each feed as it comes and forget about the last one. Just concentrate on getting her on correctly each time, and re-attaching if she slips back.

Its ok to be a learner. We've all been there. I didn't leave the house for the first 3 weeks let alone bf in public!
I promise you it gets easier!!!

[Shanti]

Don't worry Sara you are doing a great job. It takes weeks to get it right from what everyone has told me and hey look at me, i'm 4 weeks ahead of you and STILL experiencing a bit of pain when she attaches and i've been told i'm attaching 'beautifully' now. It takes time.... babies are different, nipples are different etc for everyone.
And your nipple WILL heal... you should have seen mine it was horrendously cracked and bleeding for 2 weeks and it has healed now although still cracked but healing each day and cracks don't open up as much (gosh it sounds awful well it was!!)

You are doing great i wish i'd seen my LC earlier like you did!!

[Heaven]

Skye- I have some lansinoh but I don't know if I should use it or not. I keep hearing different things. Some ppl swear by it but then I've been told creams don't do anything and breastmilk is best?? I'm confused.

Janie- Thankyou! I've seen 3 LC's now, lol, I'm certainly taking advantage of them! And they all say attachment is perfect, even when I said it was still hurting!! This is on the left side. So I have no idea. That's the one with the crack so maybe it's just that that's hurting now. But she's not as good at that side and I have to take her off a few times and reattach b/c we don't get it right. And that is not good for the healing!! I wish I could just get it right but it is getting easier at least. I'm doing the football hold on that side every feed now and it doesn't seem to open the crack up as much so maybe it will heal better now. If it's still not looking like it's getting any better I think I'm going to go back to the breastfeeding clinic on Monday.

anna- Thankyou! Your experience gives me hope!! I'm almost 2 weeks down now!! Getting easier by the day! Thanks for those tips, I will try leaning back. Sometimes it does look like she's choking!! And she starts like wimpering when she's on there (which is so sad, but cute, lol).

Ren- Thankyou!! So, it will heal. Is it still healing when you're feeding off it?? Who would have thought something so natural would be so hard!!

Well, yesterday and today have been really good for the right nipple!! It looks normal now and she attaches really good on it! Most of the time she gets it first go!! So I don't stress out when I know the next feed is on that side, it seems to be just the other one that is the problem now! Still pain on the left side, guess it will just take time. I think I'm doing it right.

DH has just gone out to get a hair cut and it's the first time we've been left alone!! omg. So I've got her in the hug-a-bub which I hadn't used yet and looks like she loves it! She's very snug looking in there and sound asleep. Let's hope she stays that way. I don't know what I'll do if she wakes for a feed when he's out!! It's so hard trying to wrangle her by myself, lol. I need DH to hold her hands for me! I will have to wrap her I guess.

[Shanti]

I know what you mean about the whimpering... DD does that too! It's cute but hard to listen to as I know she's getting frustrated with the milk not coming in fast enough or too fast perhaps! She also grunts sometimes like she's trying to do a poo but she's not, she's just frustrated!!! lol poor little thing.... only on my left side she does it also....
Sara you and I are soooo alike!!!! I too have good attachment now but wonder why it still kinda hurts in a way.....
if the pain is only when she gets on and only lasts a few sucks then goes, then its just your nipple stretching and you are doing it right (i think) and your nipples will just toughen up.... (i hope!!).....
I have been told by my LC to put away the Lansinoh so i did, and just use milk on your nipple. before and after the feed to lubricate it....

It does get easier week by week.... although sometimes it feels like you take one step forward and then one step back.... thats how i've often felt..... some days are good some days not so good! But we will get there!!!

I should have taken a before and after shot of my damaged nipple it was pretty bad, even the LC said it was one of the worst she'd seen and could tell the pain was a 10/10!!! and you should see it now.... its soooo much better.... they do heal

Get the LC how to show you how to get her hands out of the way when you are about to attach, its easy. i use to have trouble too and get her wrapped or i would ask Dh to help but you need to learn to do it on your own as DH won't always be there. It's easy once you know how. with the hand that holds the boob use a finger off that hand to pull her hand away quickly then quicky attach her. does that make sense?? lol sorry if it doesnt

[Heaven]

Ren- Yeah, I don't understand why it still hurts if the attachment is good. It just must be b/c of the crack. On the right side it only hurts for like 2 seconds when she sucks it in so must be just the stretching and if it hurts for longer I take her off coz it musn't be right. But on the left it still hurts most of the time and I find it hard to tell when the attachment is wrong or if it's just hurting coz it's already sore. It looks like I'm doing it right. And most of the time the nipple is a normal shape when it comes out! I wish it would just hurry up and get better, I'm impatient! lol.
That sounds really bad Ren, where is the crack? Mine is like on the side of my nipple so it freaks me out like she's pulling it open when she sucks it in, eww...

[Shanti]

Rather than taking her off each time it hurts for longer than a few seconds, have you tried changing her position? I find that can help rather than having to take her off as that will only frustrate her more. My LC told me this and it seems to work (sometimes).
Perhaps you need to press her closer into your body, or push her bottom in more, or press in the back of her neck kinda to ensure her chin is pushed in and nose up etc....
see if that helps.

I don't understand why but every time i attach in front of my LC it doesn't hurt but when i come home and do it, it feels different!!!! and I'm doing the exact same thing LOL

Oooh mine was cracked all over in a complete circle and inside the nipple again it is hard to explain but it was very bad... my fault for letting it go 2 weeks before calling an LC to help me. I would cry every time she attached it was just awful....but i believed it would get better every one told me it would get better and pain is normal but THAT wasnt normal.... i reckon my contractions were easier than that pain!!!! now thats saying something huh.....

You're doing WONDERFUL

[Heaven]

Thanks Ren, sometimes I do try changing her position a bit but I didn't know if it was right to do that or not so thanks. I also was told by the LC that when she's on I have to flip her top lip out with my finger too coz she doesn't do that on the left side for some reason.

I don't understand why but every time i attach in front of my LC it doesn't hurt but when i come home and do it, it feels different!!!! and I'm doing the exact same thing LOL

LOL IKWYM, I think maybe it's coz I'm calmer in front of the LC bc I know she's going to help me if it hurts anyway?? And at home I'm more tense bc I have to do it myself and no one's there to tell me if it's wrong.

Oh that crack sounds horrible!! You've just reminded me, last week I was crying at every feed and it was hurting so much and I was so anxious thinking about her waking up. And I haven't cried for a few days now about the pain, so it must be getting better!! lol.

[Arcadia]

Hi again...your divet sounds EXACTLY like mine. In the end I had an LC show me how to twist my breast a little and attach her away from the divet. If you imagine your nipple is a clock face, I was attaching her from 9 to 3 o'clock, with the divet at 3 o'clock...then I was shown how to twist my breast a little and attach her from 5 to 1 o'clock...so that she was actually missing the sore part...does that make sense????

It was a bit awkward, and I had to hold DD sorta under my breast rather than to the side...it was actually easier leaning back to do this. I had to do it for about 3 or 4 days to let the nipple heal..and it did!!! I still had a divet for a few days after (even a week) but the pain went away almost instantly.

Hang in there! I remember crying and wincing in pain. My DH used to be able to tell I was feeding from the left because he cold hear the F***, f***, f*** coming from the lounge room. lol.

[Heaven]

Thanks anna, last time I fed from the left I did the football hold again and got her lying more on her back rather than side so it was a different angle like you said and it didn't hurt nearly as much!! I hope I can do it again next feed. She's about to wake up now I think.

Now that I've got my attachment sorted out will she be getting more milk out faster?? Because she doesn't seem to be feeding for as long. Before she would feed for like 40mins and then still be hungry 1/2 hr later and want more! And then want another feed in a couple of hrs. But overnight there was a stretch of 6 hrs where she didn't feed!! Great for our sleep but I don't know if that's good for her. And today she's been feeding for about 35-30mins on one side. Then she'll only have a few mins on the other side. And she won't feed again for 3hrs or 3 1/2 hrs. Is this ok?? I'm just used to her waking every 2 hrs and wanting some!!

[Snacks]

How many feeds is she fitting in to 24 hours, SJ?

[Heaven]

Hmm...what will I count as 1 feed? Sometimes she falls asleep feeding on one side and then will have the other side maybe 30mins later. So is that 1 feed or 2?

If I count it as 1 she's had 7 since this time yesterday. Today seems to be less than usual. Like every 4 hrs almost. What's the maximum time i should lket her go b/w feeds?

[Snacks]

I'm out of practice, SJ! I don't know if I'd count that as 1 or 2 feeds... Maybe depends on how long she feeds for before she falls asleep? If its 20 mins or so, then I'd count that as 2 separate feeds.
If it were me (and please don't feel that you need to do the same thing - you do what you think is right) I would probably wake her a little more often during the day to feed. So I'd try for 2-3 hourly in the day and then just let her go overnight (though depending on how many feeds she'd had in the day I'd possibly wake her if she didn't wake herself...).
Is she generally pretty sleepy? If she has more wakeful periods during the day you could just offer the breast more often then...
Sorry, thinking out loud now! The magic number is about 8-12 feeds in 24 hours, I believe. And I reckon if you're giving a top-up after 30 mins, you could probably count that as 2 if you think she's getting a fair bit into her.

ETA: Could be another question for your LC Or maybe MR or Barb or Janie will be in here soon!

[Heaven]

Thanks Amy! She has slept alot today. Maybe because I've had her in the hug-a-bub for 2 of her sleeps, maybe that had something to do with it bc she was very comfy in there and didn't want to wake up!! lol. And my boobs were very full by the time she woke up. She just woke up and hadn't had a feed for 4 hrs and only had 1 breast for about 25 mins. It was pretty full though I guess and feels soft now. I keep trying to give her the other one but she just spits it out or falls asleep, lol.

She'll probably be awake all night now feeding, lol.

[Snacks]

LOL, ah well - at least she is getting quicker at it! Easier to be awake for only half an hour in the night than 1-2 hours.
The hug-a-bub sounds like a tops idea

[Heaven]

She ended up feeding a lot last night before bed. And then only woke up once at about 2.30 for a feed. Then up again at 6.30. Pretty good night! And this morning she's been snacking all morning, lol. So looks like she's feeding a bit more frequently again today. I should just trust she knows what she wants probably. Maybe it had something to do with me starting antibiotics too.

[Arcadia]

Its a good question..."what constitutes a feed?" and it did my head in in the early days. I still don't know with my DD. Sometimes she won't even look for the boob under 4 hours and sometimes its like 1.5 hrs.

It sounds like things are going perfectly for you! I wish my DD only woke twice to feed in the night (she still wakes 4 times).

I know it feels all over the place, but you are doing such a great job. Remember you bubs is TINY and doesn't know the difference between 4 hours and 1 hour, and night and day. As long as you feel okay with the current situation, I wouldn't question a thing. Trust your baby and your boobies. They honestly have a relationship all of their own that you don't need to get involved in (that being said you can stretch feeds out once feeding is more "established").

I was advised not to feed my bub under 2.5 hours, but I honestly didn't listen and fed her whenever she wanted. So much of feeding is comfort I think. While you're both still learning I would try really hard just to go with it...

Keep posting those questions though..they're all valid and I wish I had asked more at the start too. It would have saved quite a few tears...