Thanks - and i know that bottle feeding wouldn't be the magic solution anyway, even if he'd take it. I have never even tried him with formula. He just refuses bottles, even with EBM.

My husband is a great help but I don't have many friends. I have a couple who take some of the bigger kids off for me some time, although they are such great kids I don't really need that. I Just. Need. Sleep. I've been parenting for twenty years, I'm forty years old with five kids living at home, from a demanding eighteen year old doing her last year of highscool, a twelve year old starting highschool, a ten year old, a very demanding six year old, and this delightful but high maintenance baby... and I think I'm just absolutely worn out. I could weep for it. To be honest, if I look at it positively, the thing breastfeeding Tom is great for is that I have to lie down to feed him - and I need to make more of that. Just lie there and enjoy. Lots of telly. Lots of reading. It's just this week, it feels like one huge drain on my body when I'm already having trouble!

I really need a holiday but we don't have one of those in the offing for quite some time, and money is tight anyway. I was so on top of things a few weeks ago....

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent.

Fiona, thanks for your message I've been so busy with Tom and what have you that I haven't had a lot of online time. I'm on Facebook if you want to keep up - my email is jane.still@gmail.com.