So on Friday I had a lactation consultant come out and see us as dd's feeding was becoming more and more painful not to mention the fact that she was becoming more and more unsettled, and the horrible sucking/clicking noise she makes was getting worse. I was so confused because I knew she doesn't have tongue tie and her attachment looked right it just didn't sound or feel right. Anyway the LC said it's definately not me, I am doing everything right, it's entirely her. Apparently her face is crooked (lol sounds weird I know) Sometimes apparently what happens is when they are engaged in the pelvis for a long time before birth their face can morph to be not quite straight which means she can't get a proper vaccum when feeding which is causing her to not suck properly (disorganised suck LC called it) and is causing the horrible pinching feeling I feel when she is feeding. Her suck is also causing her feeding patterns because she has to work twice as hard so she is exhausted quicker and that's why she keeps waking up 20 mins later still hungry. And what I thought was my fast flow causing all her choking is actually because she doesn't have a proper suck/swallow pattern.

Unfortunately she said it's not something that is easily fixed. We are seeing a kinesiologist on Tuesday who is apparently great at this kind of problem, apparently he helps to train certain muscles to strengthen to help her be able to suck better. She says she doesn't truly understand how he works but he produces results so I am banking on that. But other than that it's going to be tough. She said that they can sometimes produce better results feeding ebm out of a bottle because that way you can physically push the cheeks to be able to create a better vacuum but whilst she's still thriving she wants me to try to see if with the kinesiolgists help, get her feeding at the breast better because full time expressing with 2 other toddlers would be really hard work. She has the same problem with a bottle as well (the horrible clicking sound)so that wouldn't be an easy fix either. Not to mention the fact that she completely rejects the bottle as I found out last night when I tried to give her some infant gaviscon in some ebm last night. The lc said the biggest problem I will have is maintaining a healthy supply whilst she's feeding so ineffectively.

I just hope I can find the strength to put up with the 30min/hrly feedings daily and the 90min/2hrly noghtly plus a 3yo an 18 month old and the battle to keep my supply up. And whatever we have to do to try and get her sucking better. Hopefully at the end I'll be able to say we got through it and in the end enjoyed our breastfeeding journey, hopefully eventually one without pain. Right now I am just exhausted... so I hope it gets better. Fingers crossed the kinesiologist can help us.