I'm going home. I'm packing up again & going back East. To friends who love me & where I feel at home.

I still love it here & I'm struggling with the decision to leave, but I need to get away from the negativity of the people close to my friends & family. My kids are hurt & I'm struggling with depression again

I don't want to do this to my kids, but I can't keep feeling like this. And as long as these people are around, its not going to end. I'm not waiting around another year or 2, to see if they leave. The ups & downs will never end & the town is way too small to avoid it.

Of the kids the only one I worry about is DS. He's excited to go back to his close mates, but will desperately miss his little mate here The place his bestie lives back home isn't the cheapest or easiest of places to rent. I'll rent a holiday house at least during school terms I think, just to have him where I feel he needs to be for his own securities.

I'm sure this needs to be done, but I don't want to do it. I don't want to move my kids again yet But I want them to be happy & included. Not left out like they're nothing...