Thanks Ruf

I think deep down I know I'm .. well .. weeing upwind, but I just feel that it's so darn unfair!!!

I was extreamly afraid of childbirth and then I got pg for the first time and there was nothing I wanted more than to do the "natrural" thing, and then life happend and I got cheated (that's how I felt) out of the experiance. I am happy that my daughter is healthy and that I'm healthy, I'm gratefull ... and looking back it was not bad, I'm not bitter about it ... I just , kwim!!'