I had a massive tear with my 1st VB and it did take a long time to heal - at least 15 months before i was completely pain-free. BUT that was minor pain, it didn't prevent me functioning in normal life during that time. However, with my CS I had problems with healing, got an infection or something and it was 10 weeks (and a trip back to hospital for IV antibiotics) before i was able to carry the capsule, or leave the house by myself and even then only for shorter trips. BUT - and this bit's important - emotionally/psychologically, I was in a much better state after my CS than after my VB, so even though the physical recovery was slower, my whole-person recovery was faster after the CS.

FWIW - without knowing a little more about your medical care in relation to your recovery, it's hard to tell whether there may have been something else that could have been done. I was helped enormously after I saw a better doctor (9 months later) who prescribed vaginal oestrogen and if that hadn't helped (it did) the next step would have been to see a gynaecologist who could have done a surgical revision. Sometimes we think we have to put up with pain when in actual fact seeing a kinder and more skilled doctor can sort the problem out. So I do think as part of your decision-making process, you might want to get another opinion (if you can) about whether your recovery might have been better if you'd had different care. That might be enough to give you the confidence you need for another VB. Good luck with the decision