Background
I split from Ex in May, for a period he was contributing finacially, after he found full time employment. He was living in the family home and I was with my parents. I was the the one reponsibie for making sure the morgage, childcare and all bills was paid. In August I asked him to move out, he refused, I gave him until the start of Sept, the boys and I then moved back in. He then stopped contributing financially, so I told him to take over paying 50% of the day care costs, he told me he was going to cancel day care. He did take over paying his share, but left me hanging, not knowing what was happening. Because I thought he was going to be vindictive, I had the locks changed. He moved out without too much fuss. He has only had the boys overnight once and seen them on 2 other occasions for a morning or afternoon.

At some point he applied for child support, claiming he had the boys for 35% of the time, if that were true, I would need to pay him maintenence. We both supplied evidence, to which the assessment was made in my favour. They deemed I have 100% of care, which I certainly do now, since ex moved out. I wont get my first payment untill December as we have missed the November collection, but it will be back dated to September. Ex is claiming CSA has advised him to stop paying any further day care costs and that what he has contributed so far to date towards day care, should cover his payments in arrearas (sp).

Questions
My questions to all those single Mums out there is:
How do you and your ex cover those expenses related to your children?
Do you rely only or primarily on child support payments.
Who earns more and who cares more for the children?

I am particulary interested in hearing from Mums, who earn more, work full time, care for the children for the majority of the time, with ex partners who want to be involved where they can with their children. Though I want to hear from anyone who has an opinion also.

I feel essential child care expenses should be shared equally, those things such as daycare, education, medical. That child support goes towards everyday expendable expenses, such as food, clothing a roof over their head extracuricular activites, sport etc.... Am I naive thinking this?

Ex seems to think I am out to get him, I have supported him over the last 4 years, while he was trying to set up a business, which just before the spilt was in a position to start making money after the debt had finally been paid off. He was only working 20hrs per week last finacial year at a retail casual rate. I came into this relationship with assests, he did not, we had a verbal agreement that if we split I would get back what I put in. When we did split, he told me he was not sure if he would honour that agreement, though the law recongises, the assests I bought into the relationship. We are still waiting on legal settlement of our property and assets.

Thanks for listening and for any advice you can offer.