Scared of CSA debt (due to incorrect calculations)

[briggsy's girl]

are you on private or CSA collect hun?
if you are on private, you HAVE to collect it - you have no choice - if FAO find out you're not, they will cut your payment for not meeting the maintenance requirements
if you are CSA collect, they will keep a record of what you get. they will make sure you don't get overpaid - and if you do, they will reduce the amount of maintenance you get later to pay back the debt. they won't make YOU pay it back, they'll just give you less each month
if you are unsure, don't spend it - but if you've notified them he's unemployed, and they've still done this assessment, there is a reason behind it (and unless he can prove it should be otherwise, it should stand - if it does end up with the comment that you've been overpaid, you can appeal it based on you having told them the facts on x date)

[Kitt3n]

And in years to come, when the sparkle and coercive properties of Freddo frogs and big presents fades, she will know that you are the one who fought to find a safe, loving and happy place for her to grow up.
She will know you are the one who sacrificed to give that to her.
She will know that he dad didn't care enough about her to pay the child support he owed, or be man enough to live up to his responsibilities.

^^ Yes, this. Gigi, I know EXACTLY what you are going through. It's hell, so very disheartening - huge, huge, huge hugs. DD1 though her father was god, as all little girls do (as they all SHOULD do!!!) - but so very quickly they really do see through all of the sugar coating, which really is unfortunate. Daddies should be god to their little girls. Sooner or later she will see how amazing you are, but for now those freddo frogs are going to be your arch enemy

Be gently, kind, and patient on YOURSELF. We all know you already are with Bilby

And NEVER rely on him paying it anyway. They rarely do.
.

YES THIS!!!! We only started recieving CS after secen years, it's so very irregular are never what he should be paying (he makes mega money now but can't afford to support his daughter)

are you on private or CSA collect hun?
)

And YES THIS! If you are not already on collect just give them a call. I wanted to do the right thing, I wanted to keep things amicable - I asked her father to please just pay her school fees (public school, nothing fancy) and school uniforms, that's it - he didnt even have to pay it directly to me, he could pay the school. He couln't even do this, so I left it up to CSA. SO much easier, you don't have to deal with him and money, just let them do it.

Sending you lots and lots of strength Gigi xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

[Gigi]

are you on private or CSA collect hun?

CSA collect Brigsy.


if you are unsure, don't spend it - but if you've notified them he's unemployed, and they've still done this assessment, there is a reason behind it (and unless he can prove it should be otherwise, it should stand - if it does end up with the comment that you've been overpaid, you can appeal it based on you having told them the facts on x date)

X has also told them he's on unemployment benefits right now. He resigned from a job in April, left with 7 yrs of pro rata annual leave. Worked a slightly higher paid job for six months, then got a small payout from them (redundancy). So all of that is being counted as this year's income. I was surprised his annual leave and redundancy was being counted, i assumed it would just be annual wages.

He's crying poor constantly, e.g has no money to buy bilby some crayons, or the summer pjs she needs. So i'm assuming he's gone thru the annual leave pro rata. Just before we left, he was on a buying spree, things kept popping up that made me think "how did he buy that?" e.g pro level camera. We haven't had open talks about money since bilby arrived, so i didn't dare ask "what do you plan to do with the annual leave pro rata", like i would have, if we had a proper relationship.

[briggsy's girl]

CSA have rules in place if he hasn't don't his tax return too. essentially there is the income support level payments (your $6.90 per week) and then there are "hidden income" levels - so for someone self employed running their business at neglible profit or even a loss, they are still deemed to have income. given your ex' circumstances, they may be using these rules as assuming he hasn't done his taxes to hide income and avoid paying. Being CSA collect, they will tally what he doesn't pay now and collect it later from him. they will also have "flags" set up that will trigger when he starts work (signs a tax declaration form etc) and arrange garnishing etc

[Gigi]

at the moment, there is no business, he's just on unemployment benefits. There was talk earlier of him doing the NEIS scheme (12 week course with Centrelink, to start your own business), but now, he tells me, he's not signed up to do that afterall. argh. he keeps changing the story, i can't keep up.

so, it still seems unrealistic, that he pay $50 per week, when his entire income, is just Centrelink.

If CL and CSA is working out his CS payments, based on the job payout he resigned from back in April, well, i think he's spent all that already (apart from the fancy camera, i have no idea, what it was spent on).

i have no knowledge of what he did, when he got 7yrs of pro-rata long service leave (Easter last year), he told one person i know, that he was keeping that in the bank, to help "keep the family afloat" if the new business (that was supposedly going to start Spring last year) needed help at the start. Now he speaks like it's all gone and he's crying poor over EVERYTHING. e.g unable to pay for bilby's basics. I had to pay for virtually all bilby's expenses when we were together. I feel like nothing has changed. He STILL has no idea what her expenses are and won't take any responsibility for them. I provided bilby basics (sheets, pjs, toiletries, toothbrush) so he can have her for overnight visits. If it was up to him, she'd sleep on a bare campbed mattress with no pjs.

he gave her two expensive xmas presents, which were pretty OTT for his financial situation, yet, won't pay for her basics (stuff she needs on her visits to his place).

[briggsy's girl]

even if he has no income at the moment, the fact he hasn't done his tax returns for so long, the CSA are likely deeming him to be trying to hide his income. as a result, they would base it on the higher amount having to be paid. he can definitely ask for a reassessment, but it's up to CSA to deem what it is going to say his assessment is going to be.

FWIW - i have seen assessments go up in arrears (so mum is owed back pay) but generally if a lower assessment is received, it's received from now, not going backwards, so it's unlikely it would be backdated and taken off you

[Gigi]

FWIW - i have seen assessments go up in arrears (so mum is owed back pay) but generally if a lower assessment is received, it's received from now, not going backwards, so it's unlikely it would be backdated and taken off you

god i feel dense. I read what you typed, and i don't even understand it.
does that mean, if he DOES put in his tax returns, and the CS assessment shows he has paid too much, does that mean, i will not have to pay back the difference? Sorry to be so thick, but i find that so hard to believe. I don't doubt YOU brigsy, i am just so unsure about money in general, and so scared of debt.

i haven't received any CS yet, and we REALLY could use it, but i'm scared to spend it (if and when it arrives) - until i understand what you put.

the debts i have incurred with CL (due to his incorrect calculations in the past) i find very upsetting. I've tried hard all my life NEVER to be in debt, to live within my means, go without stuff, in order to pay my bills. So to have had TWO CL debts (one took me the last three years to pay back, the second one, i only received a month ago) - is a really big kick in the guts, for me. Neither of them were to do with me, both were to do with incorrect figure HE gave CL. But it a black mark against my name.

[briggsy's girl]

if they changed the assessment tomorrow, it would be from tomorrows date - it wouldn't be backdated, so you wouldn't have to pay anything back. and if for some reason they were deemed to have made a mistake and they backdated it, they wouldn't make you pay it back, they would say that you either get nothing at all for a while, or instead of the 6.90 he is supposed to pay each week, you may only get 5.00 or something per week until any overpayment is corrected

with the c'link debts, what sort of debts are they? are the debts for him not lodging his tax returns? if they are, they should be able to freeze them indefinitely as they won't hold you accountable for your ex partner not lodging his taxes (current partner for sure, but not an ex partner)