4yo with possible ASD - please offer some advice

[Ginger]

Agree with meow. He's still just the same kid he was before. At least now I've been able to do lots of reading and learning, and adjust the way I communicate with him. He's still the coolest kid I've ever met. Hang in there xo

[surprised]

Big hugs. Are you getting a sleep study done? Surely interrupted sleep would cause daytime issues?

Depending on your philosophical bent if you aren't happy with the diagnosis you receive, you could explore some other areas. We've been seek some great results from our kinesiologist, who also deals in retained neonatal reflexes. I know not everyone agrees with this stuff but just thought I'd mention it.

[onthefly]

The absolute best thing you can do right now is pursue expert professional help, which is what the paed is for. It can be a long process, but figuring stuff out will help you to put your son into a more useful context and allow you to understand where he's coming from better. This is what changes, that and maybe being able to get some help where you guys need it. Also, the sooner you do it the better.
I would suggest looking into the sleep thing, because lack of sleep is a possible contributing factor, and maybe also stuff like diet, too. Sometimes these things all linked together and there's quite a growing body of evidence that gut health is linked to things like autism.