4 year old kinder - or 3 year old again? (VIC)

[Junglemum]

Lenny- Dd1 goes to Montessori in Frankston. It's fantastic and she loves it. The one you're talking about will only take your kids if you commit to the full 3 year program. The one Dd goes to is more flexible. He certainly wouldn't be bored there but the other thing that turns people off is that the program is full days. Dd goes from 9-3.30 3 days a week. Pm me if you you want any more info.

I know everyone these days says keep your kids back but I think it really depends on the kid. I started at 4 and was 17 starting uni. I was always the smallest ( and perhaps feistiest) until about year 10 when I became 'average' .
I never ever struggled socially or academically. Even when my friends were 18 and i was 17 it really wasn't a big deal, in fact I think it has distinct advantages, like not being able to suddenly drive and go to the pub half way through year 12.

I know people say boys are different, less mature, but a close friend is a June baby and he too never struggled and finished with a great score. So I don't think it is a one rule fits all. I think it has a lot to do with personality, perhaps if I was shy and retiring things may have been different.

I'm not sure what I'll do with my march baby but I won't be holding her back if I think she is ready.

[briggsy's girl]

I know everyone these days says keep your kids back but I think it really depends on the kid. I started at 4 and was 17 starting uni. I was always the smallest ( and perhaps feistiest) until about year 10 when I became 'average' .
I never ever struggled socially or academically. Even when my friends were 18 and i was 17 it really wasn't a big deal, in fact I think it has distinct advantages, like not being able to suddenly drive and go to the pub half way through year 12.

this was me too - some of my friends were 19 a month after finishing year 12, and i wasn't quite 17.5 - and honestly, i think i did better because i was younger! I had parents that didn't ride the "you're not 18, you can't do xyz" message home - they treated me as a young adult. i didn't have a car, i wasn't partying at the pub. i applied myself because i wanted to. i was allowed to go to the parties on weekends if i wanted to. i watched my "adult" friends write themselves off so often and it just didn't appeal.

i'm actually upset that DD has to wait until she is almost 4 before starting 3yo kinder. she is ready for that already (IMO - mum used to do FDC, so i've seen the developmental differences in kids for years) - I am thinking we will have to find a way to get her into a day care position of some sort at least one day a week soon, just to give her that mental stimulation that she needs.

as has been said, all kids are different - don't focus on the number with his age, focus on HIM - if you think he will benefit long term in being kept from kinder for a year, then do it. if you think he would be hindered by taking that step back, then don't repeat it kwim?

[sas85]

This thread has been a real eye-opener. I'm a little confused about the kinder programs in Victoria as they seem different from NSW pre-school arrangements.
But I've already started to wonder what I'll do with DD2 when it comes time to send her to school albeit a few years off yet. I envisage them only being a year apart, but discovered recently that I'll HAVE to start DD1 when she's not long turned 5 because she scrapes in turning 6 in the following school year being a December baby. So am now wondering if DD2 is ready if I should start her at 4.5 the following year. (June is the NSW cut off date 4.5 to the year they start 6 is I believe the rule of when they have to start Kindergarten). I'm taking on board all the comments though about starting them later if possible. I guess until now I'd never really thought of it that way, I started school at 4.5 had already started reading thanks to my mother and older brothers and was at the top of my grade the whole way through. Being a year younger certainly had its disadvantages when it came to my already natural suckiness at any physical activity, but honestly I think how you do in school academically and socially integrate is way to individual to have to do with blanket age. For me starting early gave me a distinct advantage over my peers when it came to finding a job - being a year younger and on a lower rate of pay for the same level was a + in my column for employers.

[Lenny]

MadB - yes it makes a difference. She's in the system and she knows what your DS is capable of and other children.

One rule does not fit all - but sheesh, it'd make deciding easier, wouldn't it

One deciding factor for me was imagining a gifted or troubled or misunderstood boy at age 8 struggling at school. I don't want the first response to be 'he's too young, put him back a year'. I don't want his age to be his excuse ever.