Zander goes to preschool (or kinder) which is kind of different, but I only called on the very first day to make sure he was ok & that was it. I don't think they'd think any less of you if you didn't call each day he's there, probably just think you're busy looking after DD.
Having worked in a creche and been a mum with a child in care (occassional care) I can see both sides. From the carers side it can be very tricky having phone conversations in the middle of the day when there are lots of transistions: coming in from play... have to wash hands... change nappies... clear tables for lunch... heat bottles... settle children down to their meals... feed babies... deal with non-eating... toileting... getting ready for rest time... patting to sleep if required... calming active children... writing up documentation (in each child's diary). It was the busiest time of the day. Any phone call at that time of the day was kept very brief. If parents wanted a longer chat with the carers then it was better to wait until about 2pm when most children were up from rest time and settled back into activites.
Your centre might be different... but I would imagine that most centres would at least be preparing for lunch (if not actually having it) at about midday. Also this was the time of the day that the usual carers often had lunch and a roving reliever carer would fill in.... in which case they might not know much about your child either.
Could you call closer to 2pm? We rarely received calls from parents every day... like you said it's hard to talk on the phone and watch little children... and more-so for childcare workers. We usually only received calls if there was a specific issue to be discussed or if the child was new.
Also our director tended to take most calls from parents so as to make it safer for the children (an un-distracted staff member is safer).
Mel - you have a a special communication boook that they can write things down during the day about what is happening? and what he has been up to?
Some days i called and others i didnt.
To be honest they are probably so busy looking after so many kids at once they wouldnt notice which mums rang and which didnt
So it is up to you. Dont ring just because you feel you should
Bath - yeah I was calling around 1.45 - cos my lunch was from 1-2 - and thats about the same time I was doing it now that I'm not working .... but i see your point.. and I would rather them not be distracted when looking after 8 or so toddlers!! LOL
PP - yeah they do have a communication book - but DH usually picks him up so I don't actually have a lot of contact with them!!! I'll pick him up tonight though - I'll make DH stay in the car with DD.. lol
We wrote very detailed accounts of each child's day in their communication books (which took almost an hour a day to do for 10 books...in between patting children to sleep etc... we did it while they napped...each child often got up to a page of a standard exercise book..... usually half a page per day). We also invited parents to write questions or queries in it and we would reply in written form underneath. When done well it can be a great tool for staying informed A much better method than having 10 parents ringing during the day every day (Eeeek!) Personally I never minded if a parent rang to pass on important info or asking a specific one-off question that couldn't wait until collection time.... but if every parent rang just to have a chat it would have made our working day quite challenging. That's not to put you off if you are genuinely concerned though If you are worried about something then they ought to be open to that.
Last edited by Bathsheba; September 26th, 2008 at 04:17 PM.
My daughter goes to Family Day care, so not a centre but anyways. I do call in the middle of the day if she was really upset or feral when I dropped her off, but otherwise I dont call. Our FDC lady rings me at work if there are any probs. I called on the first day she went, more for me because I was still not 100% happy about being away from her.
I dont like to call if I dont really need to for the reasons that Bathsheba mentioned (and because its FDC, its just one carer looking after the kids). I've done some casual work in a child care centre and it was difficilt when parents called and there was a child who wanted something from you. Like you said - you hate talking on the phone when your daughter is screaming - theyve probably got other distractions making them sound distant.
They wont think youre a crap mum for not calling. Most parents dont call their child care centre every day. Maybe when you pick him up you can ask them about his day, or just call them if he was really upset when you dropped him off.
I am always happy to have parents call. And, as I'm sure I've said loads of times before, I'd rather have a parent call me than be asked to call them, because of the ****ing about, getting out of the room, getting the phone, getting child's file, digging your number out, then your work number, thenyour mobile, then your partner's number, leaving 4 messages, then waiting to get a call back. Much easier to be handed the phone and be told "it's Mel..."
I used to work with one parent who phoned us three times a day, and often cried when leaving her 15month old, which was awful to see but completely understandable. There were also mums who never called, but if something was wrong and we called them, they'd be there in 10 minutes.
We don't judge anyone who loves their child... if they arrive in a fresh nappy, clean(ish!) clothes, are fed and we're informed, then we're pretty well happy.
Because you're not seeing them, next time you call, ask them abotu a way you can better stay in touch. Maybe the communication book can travel to and from in Aricyn's bag? Maybe you can set a time of the day for you to call them? A good CCW will have some good ideas on how to do this.
I don't call anymore, unless one of them was upset in the morning (which is pretty rare). At first I rang but not now. And I'm pretty sure the carers don't think any less of me. Really though, it's up to you. If I didn't do most of the pick ups, I'd probably ring more often just to have that contact with the carers and find out if anything in particular happened. But as Bath said, I'd probably do it later in the day as lunchtime is a bit chaotic for them.
I'm the same as Manta, unless they're upset or clingy when I dropped them off I don't call.
I never have to call with Emily, she loves kindy and busts a gut to get there. Toby's a bit of a mama's boy and he sometimes goes through phases where he throws a fit so I find I call more often with him - but he's also in family daycare so she only has a few kids to worry about!
But yeah, lunch time is usually pretty chaotic no matter what form of care you're using...so if you want to call you might find you get a better response during nap time after lunch when things are less hectic.
I don't call ... except when dd is sick, then I call around after lunch (their nap time) just to make sure about her temp and to hear if they think I need to make her a dr's appointment for after pick-up. Two minutes phone time max.
It does NOT make you a bad mommy if you don't call the day-care everyday. They should call you if something really bad happnes or if they have a situation that they can't handle.
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A much better method than having 10 parents ringing during the day every day (Eeeek!) Personally I never minded if a parent rang to pass on important info or asking a specific one-off question that couldn't wait until collection time.... but if every parent rang just to have a chat it would have made our working day quite challenging. That's not to put you off if you are genuinely concerned though
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