thread: Changing childcare, what to expect and will I regret it???

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Aug 2006
    1,074

    Changing childcare, what to expect and will I regret it???

    My DS is nearly three. He has been at his daycare two days a week for the last year when he started childcare for the first time. We moved and the travel time is inconvenient and as the children have started talking I have noticed that many of them say and teach my son undesirable things. He is going to change to the 3's room soon and I wondered if it would be a good time to think about changing him to another centre. I'm a casual teacher and I have to be at school by 8 and am restricting myself at what schools I can put my name down at because his centre is quite far. If I'm not working it is an hour roundtrip twice a day. What should I do? Will he hate it and will it be like starting all over again? I was also ho

    ping he might make a friend or two by starting at somewhere close to home where the kids might go to the local primary schoool? Please help!!! The other factor is that my sil's child is at the same centre however she elected to start her child at 3 and has given me a few guilt trips (well more than a few actually) as she sees him there then talks to him and she picks her little one early which my son hates as they start outdoor play at 3pm and doesn't like to be picked up then....what do you think?

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Member

    Oct 2007
    Gold Coast
    860

    I think the ability to cope with change is individual - you probably won't know until you try it. Having said that, children are generally much better at change than we are so you might get a nice surprise. If you act happy about it, and don't let him see your anxiety, he will find it easier too.

    I'll be facing the same thing when I change DD's centre next year. I want her to go to the centre attached to the school she'll be attending so she can make friends as she gets a little older. Personally, I think she'll not miss her current friends as much as she would if I waited until she was prep age to swap her over, IYKWIM?

    Oh, and I also have to wait until some afternoon outdoor play has been had before I am 'allowed' to pick her up! lol

    How about suggesting to the new centre that you'd like to bring him in for a couple of play visits and watch how he handles things, maybe pop in and out of the room and see what kind of reaction you get? Might give you an idea of what to expect anyway.

    Good luck

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Mar 2010
    1

    Everything will be just fine

    I would venture to guess that by talking with your son about the opportunity to meet new friends and taking the advice of the previous poster and easing him into it, he will be just fine. I’m not happy to say that my 5-year-ol d daughter has been at numerous centers due to work related relocations. What I can say is that she responded much better than I ever could have expected. In addition to taking him for a couple of visits before transitioning completely, one thing I also learned to be quite useful was to schedule a meeting with the head teacher of the classroom she would be joining. That gave me the opportunity to speak ahead of time with the teacher about my child’s likes/dislikes, discipline, communication style, etc. Many centers, at least here in the US, have the parent(s) fill out a form that includes much of the previous mentioned information, however, I’ve found that the transition goes much more smoothly when the one-on-one discussion takes place. Additionally, I might suggest allowing him to pick out a new lunch box or backpack as a way to celebrate starting at his new school. BTW, I am often greeted by my daughter at the end of the day with, “I don’t want to go home yet!”….not “hello,” not “mommy’s here,” just simply that she is not ready to go home. They really do have a great time. Think about it, when you get the chance for a girls night out, (which if you’re anything like me probably happens rarely and has to be planned months in advance) you probably don’t want to come running home either. I think it’s about the same for them.

    As far as the commute is concerned, don’t even stop to think about it for a moment…you should definitely move centers. Think about what you could accomplish with another two hours in your day…not to mention having some additional flexibility with your work schedule.

    The sil issue is a totally different matter. I am still amazed that some moms are so quick to judge. Financially, I didn’t have a choice and both of my daughters have been in daycare since they were months old…and full time at that. Needless to say, I’ve had my fair share of guilt trips thrown my way. Be confident in the fact that nobody knows your son better than you do and that you’re doing what you believe to be best for him. Maybe the best thing to say the next time she throws a snide remark is simply, “(Insert your hubby’s name), (the teacher’s name), (son’s doctor’s name) and I have had a discussion about the time (your son’s name) spends at daycare and everyone has agreed that it is quite healthy for his development. “ I’ve found that whenever you invoke the opinions of “experts,” especially the doctor as the expert, that seems to shut people up but in a polite manner.

    Best of luck and I hope it all works out!