Hi,

I agree with PP that sneaking out is not the best thing to do. It creates anxiety in the child. My DD has been in DC since she was around 12 months old (3 days a week). We have gone through various stages of tears, but the majority of the time she is happy to be there. My advice is also to make the good bye succinct. I give DD a kiss and a cuddle and say Bye-Bye, Mummy is going to work now - I will be back to pick you up after high tea (or whatever time it is that I am picking her up). I think that if you can be very clear of when you are picking them up and then also KEEP that promise to them, they build up trust that you will be back. If DD is a little clingy one of the carers will always come over to have a cuddle with her whilst we are leaving and also to start distracting her with an activity.

It is such a hard time adjusting to them going to DC, but in my experience I think it is harder on Mummy than bubs! I have to say though that at our DC centre if a child had been like that, they have really strict rules about never leaving a child to cry - they would comfort them and spend the one on one time to get them back on track. I know it is hard on the carers when they have so many children to look after, but the have it down pat at our centre - it truly amazes me!

Talk to your carers about your expectations also. Get an idea of what their methodology is and let them know what YOU want them to do. Another thing I do is I call every day in the afternoon for a brief chat with the room leader to see how DD's day has been and to find out how she has been in herself. If I am particularly concerned due to a tearful drop off I will call about an hour later to see how she has settled down.

GL!
Janie xxx