I hate it!

[OceanPrincess]

Dropping my kids at childcare

I know it works for a lot of people and I know a lot of people love it and I know a lot of KIDS love it... I am not judging anyone... It is just really hard for me.

I have never been reluctant to leave my kids with other people to look after. But leaving them in c/care just seems different. Today was Day 4 at c/care - they were both happy enough when we arrived, they went to have some brekkie and waved goodbye and blew kisses as I left, so that is great. From what I've heard it can take some kids a long while to adjust... there wasn't any crying when I left today, so that's great

But I hate it. I hate having to go to work and feeling like I'm missing out on things with my kiddies. I want to be at home and have them with me.

You'd think after being at work for a while now I'd be used to it... but c/care just seems different.

Does it get easier?

[peanutter]

yes it will

not sure what else I can say ... but it definately will get easier, lovely xo

[Beach Mama]

I hate it too hun, especially if I have had an awful morning rushing around to get them ready for creche in the first place, or if JJ plays up and cries when I leave him. That is awful. Not sure it gets any easier really - I would much much rather be a SAHM full time, but my mental health and our wallets won't allow it. I am also coming from a place of being used to being at home and dealing with having to possibly work F/T next year once DD is in school so we can achieve our sea change. Enjoy every minute that you do have with them hun xoxox I guess for me it didn't get easier so much as I got used to it?

[OceanPrincess]

... Enjoy every minute that you do have with them hun xoxox

Thanks guys. I guess that is key Tan - I should be making the most of the time I do have with them and not getting so caught up in housework and stuff.

Sigh! Need to get used to it!

[RhiChiChi]

It does get easier but there are some days when I really wish I didn't have to work. Like today DD told me she didn't want to go to creche :-( But I couldn't get out of working today so off we go. She was happy enough once there

[Rowellen]

It does get easier. I recommend talking to the carers at drop-off's & pick-ups. That way you can get to know them so it doesn't feel so much like leaving them with strangers. DS loves CC & doesn't want to come home, but most mornings, he still gets a bit sad. I hate leaving him when he has his sad days.

[~me~]

Are you using Child Care Centre or Family Day Care? I had issues with DD at our Child Care Centre, she hated being dropped off. The boys had no problem. Now that both boys are at school, I have just moved her to a Family Day Care lady, and this lady is lovely! It could be worth looking into I went through VIP which is our local Family Day Care provider who matched us up. She is only just around the corner and is already treating DD like her own. I have actually had issues getting DD to leave
Otherwise, yes, it will get easier.

[Earthmama]

Oh hun, it’s such an awful position to be in, I know ! We have our days too. Some days are really good and it all flows and other days there are tears and I’m not just talking bout my DD ! It DID get easier for both of us but you know, there are still those days that I wish I was sitting on the lounge room floor with DD ,eating nutella on toast and singing “The wheels on the bus go round and roud “ …… BIG :HUG:

[jacklicky]

It does get easier. We still have days where I drop DD off and she crys for me not to go. But at the end of the day i pick her up and she tells me about her 'friends' and all the things she did I feel happy.

Would I prefer to be at home looking after her.....YEAP in a heartbeat but i also know she gets so much out of being there especially as she is the only child at the moment.

If i could ever find a way to earn money without having to work (or make DH work harder ) I would be in heaven....That said when new bubs comes along I am thinking of leaving her in care a day or two if I can afford it just so she can be with her friends!

Ive been back at work for 2 and a bit years now....

[OceanPrincess]

Heather - we are using child care/long day care but it is a great centre, primarily for the fact that one of the carer's there used to look after my DH when he was little She had her own baby and knew my MIL so offered to look after MIL's kids when MIL went back to work. And now she is working professionally in child care at this centre.

So she is great with my kids - she is there in the mornings too which makes it easier.

It just seems to be some sort of mental thing for me...

[Mak]

OP - I have struggled most with the feeling like I was letting my girls down by sending them to cc. Completely irrational and OTT but sometimes that is how it feels. On the flip side they have had an amazing time and made some great friends and the reality is we wouldn't be in the same spot of I didn't work. So big hugs - it does get better.

[Floweryfields]

Totally natural way to feel!

[sloane]

no advice but lots of

[OceanPrincess]

Thanks gals. The ILs picked them up today, all seemed fine, again. Think I just need some time to get used to it all...

[MummyNaomi]

OP - It does get easier, I promise! When I first put DS in care and returned to work, I felt like I had let him down - I felt like I should always be there for him, and I got a shock when we got a disk of photos of him at care at the end of the year (5 months later) and realised that he had a whole life separate from me - what the? He was still well under 2 at that stage. I know I'll go through the same with the next baby

However it gets easier all the time, and he does so much fun stuff that he loves that I'd never think to do (eg art/crafts/different play) and they teach him things I haven't even thought about yet. Kids learn so much from each other that I think we forget as parents that we don't need to be their only teacher and influence, the whole "it takes a village to raise a child" is certainly true At the age of your DD and DS there is so much to learn, they are such sponges, so no doubt they will be having lots of fun and some wonderful experiences at care, it also helps when there is someone there that you trust, you know your family friend will always look out for them

Having DS in care 2 days a week has taught me to appreciate the days I have with him much more - I rarely find myself over it and at the end of my tether as I sometimes did as a SAHM not in the workforce (although both working and SAHMs have their challenges don't they?)

Best advice is what you are feeling is very normal, and I hope you make peace with it, you are not doing your children a disservice in any way, and have them interacting in a safe, loving environment where your little sponges are having a ball and learning lots and having fun with other little people. I'm actually a big CC advocate, even though my preference is not to work, I have to, so I choose the best possible environment for my kid and as a result, he's thriving, and super smart, he's learnt more than I ever would have though to teach him at home

[AliBaby]

hun. It will get easier.

If it helps think about all the problems you had with the nanny and know that the kids are now in a very stimualted environment socialising, playing, learning and growing in independence (and not making mess at your house during the day when they are daycare- that always helps me ). It is also great that they have a wonderful carer there.