Returning to work soon - CC dilemna...

[christy]

You'd be surprised what you can find. & the MIL option doesn't sound bad at all!! I totally understand how hard it is to leave your babies with anyone else.

[MantaRay]

I'm going to be a lone voice here I think. But FWIW, here is my opinion. My boys have 2 days a week in Day care and 3 days a week MIL and FIL come here to mind them. I personally like the balance, as I think they get a lot out of day care, and they really love it. Personally I find it easier to leave them on day care days. I think 2 days each way could work well for you too.

Given the difficulty with timings for you though, I don't think a centre near you will work well. Have you looked into centres near work? When I went back to work after J, he was in day care in the CBD near where DH and I worked. I loved that he was so close, and we got all that extra time together with the trip in and home, and I also went and bf/played with him every lunch time until he moved rooms and slept at lunchtime. It was always great to know that we didn't have to rush to pick him up too. If one of us was running late, the other one went down to pick him up and if need be took him back to work to wait for the other parent (we were lucky we worked in the same building). Anyway, just some food for thought.

[Willow]

MR yep, I have considered that option but I think Sydney CBD and Brisbane CBD might be too different things! (but it's been a long time since I've been to Brisbane!). Day care fees in the CBD start at $100 a day per child (I'm yet to hear of a centre in the CBD that charges any less and even if they did, I assume the waiting list would be enormous). That's $400 a week at least and we just can't afford it. Well we can but there'd be no point in me working really, most of my pay would go on day care. Kinda defeats the purpose. And I catch the train to and from work - a peak hour City Rail train is no place for a 10 month old baby. I would be genuinely concerned about his safety.

I work for one of the bigger law firms in the city, I wish they'd get with the times and have on site day care, how much easier would life be...although I'd still have the concern with public transport.

WRT splitting their care, if it was more than two days, I'd definitely consider it because I think any more than 2 days would probably be too much for MIL. But having them in care one day and with her one day doesn't really appeal either. I think it would put both of their routines out and would take them so much longer to adapt to care if they were only going one day a week. DD is a sensitive child, she likes routine and doesn't cope with change as well as some kids (bit like her mum really!!) She has also been going through a phase of separation anxiety since L was born and I think would benefit from being in familiar surroundings for the time being.

I'm feeling a big sense of relief thinking that the kids won't be going to day care - that's gotta be saying something right??

[MantaRay]

Willow, I think that tells you all you need to know hun.

[Willow]

Yeah, me too...

Thanks so much for helping me nut this out girls, as always, you've been a huge help!

[~Trish~]

I think you are making the right decision going with your MIL, she sounds ideal. I would much prefer a family member that I trust than someone I don't really know. I think it will be great for your kids to form a special bond with her. It's great that you've spoken to her and set some boundaries. Don't be afraid to follow them up if you have to, she won't hate you for it!

I am very overprotective of my boys and can't imagine putting them in DC (please don't think I have a problem with DC, I think I have personal overprotective "issues" LOL), but I would definitely feel comfortable with a capable and (mostly) trustworthy family member.

Your sense of relief is definitely telling you something

[mbear]

Gosh, i really feel for you making a decision like this. I hate leaving my girls with anyone...even my own mum whom i love to death, let alone MIL.... You do sound (in latter posts, once you spoke to MIL) a bit more relieved. I think you chose the right option. Good luck with it all....

[Willow]

Thanks guys...

Trish - you think you have issues, you know how mental I am about L!! I was the same with DD but not to this degree (not that I love her or worry about her any less of course, it's just because of all the stuff that happened in between)! I've just told myself that if it doesn't work out and it's making any of us miserable then I can always stop working. We can get by without it, it won't be the end of the world (well, it might to DH! LOL).