Depends on the child - a child could settle straight away or it could take months. I do FDC and see different reactions all the time. I have a 2-1/2 yo at the moment, been here since Feb, one day a week (his brother and sister had been coming here for the last few years, so he was always in and out with them). Will cry most weeks when mum leaves, but settles within minutes. This boy is also very shy.
I have had others that may take only a couple of weeks. You could be right that you may have to re-settle DD every term if DH takes her out. He may be better sending her for a couple of hours each day, so she is still in the routine of going to day care which will make it easier on all of you when he goes back to work.
My DD settled in (initially) very quickly... within a week. She was 4.5 months old. However, she recently moved up a room and it has taken about 6 (loooooooooooooooooong) weeks for her to settle in... so I guess it depends on the child and the carers...
Hi hun, I know it must be the hardest thing for parents to leave their children when they are upset. I am a kindy teacher and see it alot at the start of the year or when a new child arrives. I know I will probably find it hard when my little girl reaches that age where I have to leave her.
The best thing you can do those is to leave her and not let her get into the habit of her thinking that when she cries that you will stay. the problem will just get worse.
If you are really worried you could always get the preschool to call you if she cries for longer than 40 minutes (or however longis too long in your mind). I am sure she is fine once she is distracted and will get used to it within a few weeks.
Good luck for this difficult time and I hope your DD is feeling much better.
Thanks everyone. DH and I were doing something in the foyer this morning and we could hear that she stopped crying within a minute of walking out the door so that was good. She still looked a bit upset, but was sitting on the director's lap with some playdoh.
Glad today went better for you and DH and DD. It is okay that she was with the director on her lap. Im sure she wouldnt have stayed there all day and would have settled in well. You could ask preschool as well if she has anyone there that she likes to play with and have them over one day for a little play so that then DD has someone that she feels comfortable playing with when you leave her.
I just wanted to let you know that I think that is completely normal behvaiour. If she was crying through the day, I'd be worried, but at 13 months they *all* cry at separation. Those who don't are the exception. If she's easily distracted out of it, with a cuddle and some playdough, it is normal (although hard!) and she will be OK.
There are kids out there who still cry on separation at 4 or 5 after being in care from 6 months! They are fine most of the day, and it's a fairly healthy reaction from a child who has a good strong relationship with their parents.
So expect the brief episodes to last for a while. If she's crying when you arrive, then I'd be a little more concerned.
As for school holidays.... I don't know the best solution! Not that I claim to have all the answers, but after 9 years in childcare I am pretty cluey about what works, and honestly, the jury's out. Some children's behaviour doesn't change too much after 2 weeks off, and some have a real struggle. From my position, as a caregiver, I feel like I lose a lot of ground in my own relationship with the child in that time, so feel like I'm going backwards sometimes. But on the other hand, some kids come back SO chilled out after two weeks with the folks that it's great to have them back.
Can't give you the answer, I'm sorry! But I hope you feel a bit better about it all.
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