Sorry this may be the wrng area but I couldnt work out wherre to post this one.
A friend has 2 kids that have special needs, and has recently found out that their issues are linked to a medication she was taking immediately precdeing and throughout her pregnancy.
At the time, she checked and double checked that the medication was safe (shes taken it for a long time before the pregnancies) to continue with while TTC & pregnant and was told that it was fine to take.
From what she said, it sounds like this *was* the advice at the time but that more recent research as proven that its actually not, and its linked to her kids special needs.
Is there anything she can do/action she can take or does she just need to try not to feel guilty every day for the rest of her life (which she now does), and get on with it?
Why was she taking the medication? She did the research and if this medicine was vital (most likely) then she did the best she could with the information at the time.
How reliable is the study? Sample size, confidence, statistical significance... not that this is always the case, but if you're going to beat yourself up then you may as well make sure it's worth doing it.
You don't mention the special needs - if they're minor and the children will have fairly normal lives, again I would say that her need for medication most likely outweighed any risk. If they're major then I'd be wondering where the initial data had come from.
I dont know what the medication is called but its for epilepsy.
one child has learning issues and can only process one instruciton at a time, so you cant say 'go and get your shoes and socks' it has to be either one item at a time or she cant process it.
the other has somewhat more severe verion of the above, and CP. Recently shes been told the CP is only from the knees down? I dont know much about the condition other than what I have read online, but he is responding well to treatment.
Both kids have learning aides and will need them at least for primary school.
It sounds to me that it's a life-altering and potentially life-saving medication (not that a fit will kill you, but if you have one whilst at the top of a flight of stairs, a possible fall might). Therefore a disability which is, in all probability, not as bad as epilepsy could be - I'd say the meds were probably worth it. But I'm not in that situation and therefore cannot say that. I suppose it's for your friend to weigh that up.
Good luck to her - I hope she doesn't blame herself for trying to be as well-informed and doing the best for her children as possible.
I suppose that we can all only go with the best information that we have at any time. And if the best information that she had at the time was that it would be OK then she has nothing to feel guilty about. Sounds like, as Ryn said, that it was something that she would have needed to be taking (or something similar) for her own benefit anyway.
Maybe you could try and explain it to her by saying that it is likely that many of our mother's smoked during pregnancy because noone knew that there were potential health risks from doing it.
She wasn't trying to put her own health above that of her babies - she asked the questions and received answers from professionals so had the best information that she could - I know that that probably doesn't make it much easier for her to deal with.
If, on the other hand, you were asking more about the possibility of negligence by a Dr or the manufacturer of the drugs. It would be a relatively easy thing to find out the information that was available about the drug at the time she was prescribed it and what testing and research had been done on it.
Thanks guys.
Muppity - about both really. Shes more upset at herself than at the drug manufacturer as she seems pretty sure it wasnt something they knew about at the time. Which looking at it indicates shes made the best judgement she can at the time, but shes just not seeing it that way. I think it will just take time.
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