Thanks guys for all your replies...
I didnt really expect so much support, i was posting more to make everyone a little bit more away, i am not sure if i had read the signs i still would have put everything together, but i honestly had no idea that it was so commonly triggered by a cold/virus.

Mischa - the Dr's do think that there was any allergy trigger judging by the way that she presented, i did query this one too, also the fact that we had a camp fire for several days so when we were cooking she was exposed to that, but they thought that it would be an unlikely trigger.

Michael - thanks for your comments I agree that a spacer can be given when asleep, i actually have done it since to MJ, i have just re-read, it was obs and sats they were trying to do when she was asleep, then also shove on nasal prongs (which she had not had previously) when she was still sleeping. Most childrens nurses are exceptional and are really good at reading kids and how they will respond... but making that call on your first meeting with the child is not right. Over all though i could not fault the care that we received, it was fantastic apart from that one incident, but over the 30 hours + that we were in there that one incident pales in relation to all the other staff

Thanks again everone for your kind words