circumcision decision?????

[Mum0809]

Hi. DH and I have been trying to decide if we have a boy should he be circumcised. DH would rather have it done but I'm not too keen on the idea, I'm pretty much terrifed about getting it done but I would want to do what was best for him either way. I have done a lot of reading on the subject and know there are pros and cons both ways, though I found most to be bias one way or the other. Has anyone been very happy with their decision to have it done or not done? Has anyone had who had it done have any problems? Has anyone had their boy circumcised then wished they hadn't or anyone not have it done then wished they did?

[Kitty33]

Hi Jo jo
DH and I had our little man done.... just for family reasons I guess, eg DH is done, my dad, brother ect ect are all done, my step brother didnt and he wouldnt stop playing with his 'noo noo' when he was a toddler and it was always red and .... cheesy could you say.

We were really happy we got it done with DS.... we got the plasti bell procedure done... it all went really well.
I have never known anyone that had thier boys done to have a bad experience... with plasti bell that is.

I see we are due around that same time too
if we have another boy we will definiatly getting him done too with the plastibell procedure.

Good luck with your decision darlin
xoxo

[Kaylene]

I think O-natural is best. BUT I am not right nor am I wrong. This age old debate will go on forever. But popularity shows that 90% are not having their babies circumcised (according to 60mins show). So will having your son circumcised make them stand out in a crowd when they are at school? Funny, when I was young it was the other way around..
Good luck its got to be the hardest decision to make if you both dont agree.
K

[becky]

Hi!!
I am very much "FOR" circumcision. I believe that a little boy should be like his Daddy to, to avoid complicated questions down th track. My DS is 19 months old, and we had him done when he was 3 weeks old. Trust me, these days, it is nowhere near as traumatic anymore as it used to be. They use a new technique that is like a ring, which they put on the penis, and after a few days, the dead skin just falls off in their nappy! A few hours before the procedure, you need to put numbing cream on it, and then I think the baby hardly feels a thing! My son did not even cry or anything, and 10 minutes afterwards was quite happy to have his feed, and soon a sleep. I think it is a very personal decision, nobody should feel pressured, but I just think that in the long run, it is more hygenic, and a lot better looking too!! I have never regretted our decision for a second!
We are having a girl this time so no need to think about it this time!
Feel free to contact me if you'd like to know any more info!

[Jodie259]

Hi Jo Jo....

I think you will get decisive answers either way. There will always be anti-circumcision who will say it's unnessary and barbaric... and there will be the ones who have had it done and don't regret it at all. I don't imagine many people would regret their decision... maybe the odd one who didn't get it done at birth - then had complications that required it to be done later on.

At the end of the day - it's totally you and DH's decision. Whatever you decide, I'm sure you won't regret it. I guess it will be a bit difficult if you have conflicting opinions between you both.

In recent years circumcision became less popular - but it seems that it may be making a 'come back' again. There was a story on 60 minutes last week - which had pro & anti doctors opinions.

I had my son done. My husband is Jewish (although I'm not)... and I had no hesitation in getting it done out of respect for my husband and his family and traditions. My father and two brothers are all done - although they are not Jewish. We had a Rabbi/Mohel do the circumcision when my DS was 8 days old (Jewish tradition). It was quick, and in honesty - my son would cry more when he had his nappy removed then when he got the 'snip snip'.

There are other methods like the 'plastibel' - or leaving it a bit later and getting the area anethaesised.

My son is 15 months and there have been no problems at all.

Good luck with your decision.

[~Jo~]

Hi JoJo (great name btw!).

We definately choose not to interfere with Sammy. To us, hes perfect the way he is. Should he choose to remove his foreskin when hes an adult, then he has that right but I certainly dont believe in removing it!

Jo

[BamBam]

Hi JoJo (great name btw!).

We definately choose not to interfere with Sammy. To us, hes perfect the way he is. Should he choose to remove his foreskin when hes an adult, then he has that right but I certainly dont believe in removing it!

Jo

Ditto!

[paradise lost]

Potential infections in the glans of the penis (which are very rare) can be treated IF they occur. Even when they occur, medically circumcision is a last resort.

The penis looks after itself more or less as girls parts do, problems are rare and redness/smegma during the toddler years when they play with it (in the same way girls poke at their bits) is normal. If infection occurs some cream usually does the trick.

The vast majority of the fine-sensation nerves of the penis are in the lining of the foreskin. Removing it will significantly alter sexual sensation - of course if it is done now your son will never know different.

I'm going to PM you a link your DH and you can watch - it's medical and very informative. It does contain images of penises. It explains what the foreskin is and what it is for.

I would say the main thing i think is that if you do NOT circ and there are problems at any point in DS's life, he can have a cricumcision done. Once it is gone, it is gone.

ETA - ah, i cannot PM you as you don't have enough posts yet. You can email me from an email address for me to send the link to if you're interested (myworstfriend at hotmail dot com). It isn't about barbarity etc. it is the medical perspective on what a foreskin is for and what the loss of it means. It isn't pro-circumcision but it isn't militant either and it doesn't use upsetting images of the procedure to tug at heartstrings or anything. Anyway, the offer's there if you like

Bx

[Liz]

We didn't really make a "decision" about it.. we just knew we wouldn't get it done. DH isn't done, and hasn't had any probs with cleaning etc, and he's all about the 'loss of sensation' thing too. So we didn't put much research & thought into it.. just let DS stay the way he was made

[Schmickers]

From the point of view of a child health professional, we no longer recommend routine circumcision. The the benefits, which in reality are few apart from cosmetic, simply do not outweigh the risks - ie. infection, pain, and the risk of scarring causing a loss of sexual function later in life.

From my PERSONAL point of view, I believe that circumcision, unless there are medical grounds (and there are a few conditions later in life that can be treated with circumcision) is a cosmetic procedure, and I feel it is ethically wrong to administer a cosmetic procedure to a child who is not old enough to choose whether they want it or not. While we have not had any boys yet, it is something that my wife and I have discussed, as I am circumcised, but we still do not feel it is the way we would go.

[Phteven]

Both my boys are circumcised. They had no complications and if I have another he'll be cirumcised too. We did it for religious reasons but TBH even if we had no religious reasons I would want it done.
There is a mounting body of evidence to suggest that cirumcision helps to prevent the spread of HIV but ofcourse it's nowhere near as effective as education and a condom. New Scientist had a really interesting feature about it a while back - if you're a subscriber you can read the online version.

[Schmickers]

There is a mounting body of evidence to suggest that cirumcision helps to prevent the spread of HIV but ofcourse it's nowhere near as effective as education and a condom. New Scientist had a really interesting feature about it a while back - if you're a subscriber you can read the online version.

I did read about that, Chloe, a while ago. Much of that evidence comes from public health research into the HIV epidemic in Africa, which is indicating that African men who are circumcised have a lower incidence of HIV than those that are uncircumcised. I believe the WHO was considering recommending routine circumcision for third world countries where access to condoms and/or education about their usage was not available. The same situation doesn't apply to our society, and even the WHO were stopping short of making that recommendation because of the risks of the circumcision itself being performed in third world countries with inadequate public health standards.

So, I don't really see the HIV argument as being an adequate one to justify circumcision. As you say, education and condom usage are far more effective ways to avoid HIV. However I respect your religious beliefs, and as a parent, your right to make the choice to circumcise your children.

[Yael]

My son is circumcised, primarily for religious reasons, but i would do my future boys as well.

They didn't seem to be in pain (i've watched a baby sleep through it), and we had no problems with it afterwards.

I was told if it was done properally there should be no future problems with it.

Dach - i would be very interested to see that NS article.. might have to use DH uni logon and check it out

[MantaRay]

This is such an emotive issue and there is no right answer. If you saw 60 minutes last week you will know that even the medical experts can't agree, so how can any of us know what is best. So I believe you have to research and then trust your own instincts. Don't let anyone else's opinion sway you, do what is right for you and your family.

Personally, my boys are circed. It was done using the plastibell method and they didn't feel pain. The area is anaesthesised first with cream. One of our motivations was that we know of two adults who were circed as older children (one was 8 and I think the other was 10) due to infections (or something like that, they didn't discuss this in detail!). They felt lots of pain (the plastibell can't be done on older people) and tell everyone they know with boys that they recommend circing to avoid another boy having to go through what they did. Also, DH wanted his boys to be like him. So that was our decision. It was right for us and I'm glad we did it. It may or may not be right for you.

I wish you luck with your decision. It is not an easy one.

[mrsmac]

You will get arguments strongly on both sides of this debate and will have to come to your own decision ultimately. My DS was done by plastibel at 2 days old and has had no side effects. A friend did not get her DS done and had to get it done at 2 yrs because of some medical problem (can't remember what will ask her) and said it was very upsetting and hard for him so she got her next DS done at birth and he was fine. I have taught children who have had to have it done later (9 or 10) for infection problems and they have had to miss sport for weeks and been quite embarrassed about it at school afterwards.
Good luck deciding!

[Trillian]

*mod hat on* Firstly I would just like to say that everyone will feel pain differently and what will upset/hurt some wont upset others - so lets end that discussion right there. We cannot comment on the accuracy of that as we do not know if there was anything edited from the vision shown on 60mins at the time.

JoJo, we are in the boat where when we were having our first child we did all the research too - contacted the Family Planning Association and got a heap of info sent out (no google in those days LMAO) and carefully studies all the pros and cons. In the end there wasn't enough conclusive proof that it would be beneficial to have it done, and for him to look like daddy wasn't a good enough reason for us so we didn't do it.

Since then my DH has changed his tune and wishes that we had it done. It's something he still can't come up with a concrete reason as to why, but he has said numerous times in the past that he regrets the decision we made. I still stand by my decision though. We have never had problems with infections and DS cleans it himself in the bath every night.

With this baby we are still not getting it done as I refuse to have one child done and the other not done. They can make their own decision when they are adults and if they want it done then so be it.

At the end of the day all of our posts/advice are anecdotal and in no way can they mirror your own circumstances. All you can do is inform yourself and then make the decision that is right for your family.

[MantaRay]

Caro, IMO, that baby was not screaming in pain at all. He didn't cry for the first half and then cried, not screamed (IMO). I believe that the crying was more due to the discomfort of having no nappy on and having someone poking around. Jack cried during his procedure, but from the tone of the cry he did not sound overly distressed, and no different to how he always cried at that age whenever his nappy was off. Tom didn't cry at all until the end when he was being dressed again, and a cuddle from me stopped him crying instantly so I don't believe there could have been pain.

I know you didn't intend that remark to be inflammatory, but I think it will upset some people who have had their boys circed, and as it is such a sensitve issue and a personal decision I think it is important to be careful how things are worded on this topic. There are always people in these threads who disagree when we say that our sons felt no pain. You are most definitely entitled to your opinion. However, I have a very strong instinct when it comes to my boys, and I totatlly believe I would have known if they were in pain. And I totally believe they weren't. It is ok if you don't believe that. I don't judge you for the decision you made - I know that like me you made the decision that you believed to be right. Which is the best any of us can do.

[sirenz]

we are having a boy and have decided to have him circumcised.

we don't see any problem with it.. my dh is done and he certainly doesn't remember it getting done.. so if there is a litle bit of pain then we figure ds isn't going to be traumatised by it iykwim.

in the long run, we feel it will be more hygenic and also ds will be like his dad and he won't notice any loss of sensitivity later in life because he won't know any different.

but i do understand if people don't want to get it done.. it is a personal preference..

good luck with your decision.