thread: 14 mth old waking 3-4 times a night - what can i do?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    Inner East, Melbourne
    312

    14 mth old waking 3-4 times a night - what can i do?

    Hi,



    DD2 has always been settled by me as DH puts DD1 to bed. I've always breastfed just before sleep either day sleeps or before going down for the night.

    But DD2 is now almost 14 mths and still wakes 3 to 4 times a night and will only settle by a breastfeed which means i've had a year without quality sleep and it's impacting on everything i do!

    I feed her until she's relaxed so her eyes are open etc when i put her down in the cot - she's not asleep. Then i leave her to it. Sometimes she'll talk/winge for a while but then she'll get off to sleep by herself. All good. But it's the waking all night long and not settling for anything else other than a feed that's starting to get to me.

    All too often it'll get to 2am, i'll be over it and then she'll come into bed with me. Which is easier for me but i'm not sure she's properly rested.

    She sleeps well in the day - morning sleep about 2 hrs, afternoon sleep about 1.5 hrs. Very happy girl and very alert.

    Any suggestions of how convince her to sleep longer than 3 hrs at night without wanting me?

  2. #2
    Registered User
    Add Marlene on Facebook

    Jul 2007
    Dapto, Illawarra...NSW
    2,009

    I'll be watching this thread as this is EXACTLY what my DS does!

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Perth, WA
    171

    I've got absolutely no advice as my DS still wakes 3-4 times a night but just wanted to offer some

    I'm finding it hard to see the light at the tunnel too - sleep deprivation is a killer.

    Hope someone has some ideas.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    Inner East, Melbourne
    312

    any advice?

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    where cosmopolitans and margaritas flow all night
    2,794

    My dd is almost 14 months and sometimes wakes 2-3 times. She's bottle fed (no FF anymore, she has lactose free cows milk). My dd isn't fully awake when she cries so I just go in and shove a bottle in her mouth to soothe her and then I go off to bed. I imagine that if you are still BF that it's not that simple though. Could your DD be too hot or cold perhaps? I know that my DD will wake if she's either of these. She always kicks blankets off even if it's cold so I put her in a sleeping bag when it's cold but the disadvantage is that she can't take it off if she gets too hot.

    It could also be bad dreams that wakes your DD up in which case she needs comforting from you.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    May 2007
    127

    I have a 15 mth old exactly the same!

    We looked into Jay Gordon's thing of night weaning. I don't think it's ideal> I wouldn't recommend nightweaning except that we found we were at the 'end'. Just so damn tired and not functioning very well. (ETA he was waking up to 7 times a night and wanting milk!)

    SO. For the first few nights I still fed him but not to sleep.
    The next few nights I didnt' feed him but carried him around, sang, turned the tv on...whatever it took to calm him. It was surprisingly easy.
    Then he got sick so I started BFing in the night again.
    When I got energy enough, I started over again.
    The second time around was harder I found because I lacked the energy and wasn't consistent.

    BUT...he is sleeping MUCH better now. IF and when he wakes (a month on) he doesn't look for milk and is easily settled with a dummy and a cuddle.

    I hope that helps
    xx
    Last edited by Rahjah; April 30th, 2009 at 10:04 PM.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Sydney
    168

    Hi,
    sorry i have no advice. My DD is 13 months and is doing pretty much the same thing. I have been wondering about this because I don't really want to actively night wean but sometimes it feels like i will never get a good night's sleep again! I hope your little one starts to improve soon.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    Inner East, Melbourne
    312

    Hi, just thought i'd update my post.

    For the last 4 nights, DD has only woken once a night!!! I didn't change a thing that I was doing, but she has just started walking 2 weeks ago. I remembered the same thing happened with DD1 (but she was only waking 1 or 2 times a night which went down to going all night without waking) after she started to walk.

    Let's hope we're onto a winning trend!!

  9. #9
    Registered User

    May 2007
    127

    ah that's great!

    I remember DS was a nightmare with sleeping before he started to crawl and then walk.

    Good going.

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Apr 2007
    Somewhere here and there.....
    483

    Wow sounds just like my 13 mth DS. Has at least 2 bottles a night still but lately has been waking up to 4 times and wanting to start his day at 4 or 5 am. Last night for the first time we just put him back in his cot and let him go for it. He didn't cry just yelled on and off for hour before going back to sleep. I am starting to wonder if this is the age when asserting himself comes into play. He is throwing the odd tantrum now and refusing things he used to like. Hard to keep up sometimes.

    I am that when he starts walking he might start to sleep better.

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    New Zealand
    28

    Hi Everyone,

    My little man is doing very similar things to all of you and I too can't see a time when I will ever get a nights sleep (even him waking once would be amazing)Hes been sick nearly every month since starting creche and the last week hes has bad diahorrea which meant he wasn't eating many solids.He used to wake at 3/4am but I was able to get him back to sleep with a feed.He normally goes down at 6pm then if he wakes before 11 or 12 I don't feed him just pick him up and he normally goes asleep again.Then I used to feed him again about 2/3 so normally 2 feeds a night.The past week has been a disaster,hes been waking every 1/2 hours and I have been feeding him each time.But the worst thing is that when he wakes now at 4am I cannot get him back to sleep.Yesterday morning he woke and I tried everything feeding,rocking rubbing his back and the thing is that hes really tired rubbing his eyes yawning etc but he will not sleep.We ended up both of us in tears on the rocking chair(not a pretty sight!)I just feel sometimes I can't take it anymore.I just can't understand why he won't sleep.Is he getting teeth,he seems to be over the diahorrea but I wondered is he making up for it by feeding more.This morning same thing and I ended up bringing him into bed where he sucked and sucked not drinking just sucking but his eyes were closed but each time I tried to quietly stop him feeding he screamed the house down.Its just such a big mess.I hate as well that after him being rocked,sucking in bed etc we finally had to get up and hes exhausted.What I want is for him to wake up refreshed and awake,it makes me sad he wakes up like this.We have the cot in our room right beside the bed and I have tried rubbing his back and putting my hand on him when I see him stirring to see if it keeps him asleep but it doesn't work.We were thinking of having another baby but that would mean I would have to stop feeding and I have no idea how to do that with him.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    Inner East, Melbourne
    312

    IrishConn, you sound exhausted poor thing. I can say only from my experience that waking and needing feeding that frequently with my DD2 has always been teething related. It'll soon get easier for you both i'm sure. Feeding is so much more than just milk - it's the best comforter as i'm sure you know! How old is your little one?

    We're still on a winning run with DD2 only waking once or twice a night which is such an improvement compared to the last year. I almost feel refreshed!!

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Feb 2006
    Inner East, Melbourne
    312

    oh, and you don't have to wean to get pregnant. I was feeding DD1 6 times a day when i conceived with DD2!

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    New Zealand
    28

    Hi RoyalUK,

    Thanks for your advice and its so reassuring to hear its probably his teeth.I rang my mum in Ireland last week as was really needing some mammy advice!and when I told her all the things she said straight away it was teeth.I just wasn;t sure thats what it was but I think now it is.He only has 2 bottom ones and hes one in 3 weeks so perhaps he will get a few at once.Hes still waking at 4am on the dot every morning and I have stopped trying to get him back to sleep in his cot cause it doesn't work the only thing I can do is bring him into our bed and let him suck.This morning I think he sucked for 2 hours!Its not very comfortable as I am half sitting up but at least hes not crying and I can get a bit of sleep.I suppose I am afraid that he won't go back to his old routine,did you find that after the teeth had come they stopped feeding and went back to their old routine?Its great to hear you are having a good run it will make such a difference.Thats interesting about the pregnant thing,I was sure I would have to stop feeding but obviously not!