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Thread: 3 month old baby who desperately needs DAY sleeps...

  1. #1

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    Default 3 month old baby who desperately needs DAY sleeps...

    After visiting the MCHN yesterday I realised that I really need to get Maddy to take at least ONE daytime nap/sleep. She currently is up all day until about 5pm where she is so overtired she screams for 1-2hrs and then finally falls off to sleep for about an hour.



    Sometimes if I'm lucky I can get her to have one or two 15min naps in her pram but she never allows herself to fall into a proper sleep. I've tried her in her sleeping bag, wrapping, unwrapping..you name it, she won't sleep.

    She is almost 6kgs and I'm sure it won't be too long before the bassinet is too restrictive for her at night too. Thus, I've been trying to get her to have a day nap in her cot so she can get used to it; with the idea to eventually move her into the cot for nighttime sleeps as well.

    I don't want to turn to controlled crying because I don't personally believe in it for my child; but I've already found myself bordering on it. I feed, play and then when she shows tired signs, I put her into her cot and tell her I love her and it's time for a nap. Maddy will watch her mobile for a few minutes and then when she realises she isn't coming out, it's on for young and old.

    Today I even tried letting her cry and going in there every 5-10mins to reassure her, pat her on the leg/back, fix up the sheets etc; but she just ignores me and cries even more hysterically. I know to a certain extent she is just testing me as she'll often stop mid-cry and look at me with a smile. After an hour of this behaviour this morning, she still showed no signs of exhausting herself and I ended up having to bring her out into the lounge room with me.

    I'm generally happy to keep her with me about the house, but it does make it difficult to get anything done and she often just wants to be held and is not happy to be in the pram, on the mat on the floor or in the bouncer. The H'a'b is great but it gets hot after a while for both of us.

    Am I creating a rod for my back by not having created a better daytime sleep pattern at the beginning? It can't be good for a 3 month old baby to be awake for more than 12 hours straight but she just fights sleep no matter what.

    I'm at a loss with what to do...she gets herself so hysterical she sometimes vomits. Perhaps her problem is with the cot in particular? I just don't know what to do. Its gotten to a point where there are even days where I don't have a shower until my husband gets home because she just cries.

    Has anyone else been through this and managed to implement a day time sleep routine successfully?

  2. #2

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    Beck, you poor girl. What is the cot like? Is there something soft in it? I am still using the snuggle bed and I have bought a mink blanket to putunder her cot sheet just so it's not hard. It's not soft soft, but just provides something a little nicer than the mattress. We have not tried this yet, but it's just an idea. The snuggle bed and wrapping is working too well for us, mind you it won't for long due to her size.
    All I can suggest is persist with her in her cot, but maybe just stay in there with her with one hand on her chest sort of rocking and the other over her eyes. We do this often. She will struggle and cry for a while and eventually fall asleep. Coco only has 3 half hour sleeps in the day. I have currently got her in HAB having a bit of an extra sleep. I too get hot and tired holding her.
    Otherwise can you get a MCHN nurse to come to your house and help you there?
    Babies sleep sux. Honestly that's how I feel about it, having now had two bad sleepers!! And dont fret, Tilly didn't sleep until she was 8 months old, day or night, so it is possible to fix it now, or even further down the track. xoxoxo

  3. #3

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    I hadn't thought about the softness of the mattress Meg. We just bought one that fits...as bad as that sounds.

    Might have to invest in a sheepskin rug or something to put under the sheet.

    I've ended up putting her in her swing in her room and just leaving her there. She isn't crying (finally!) but she looks so sad, and I feel like a terrible mother! :smt022

  4. #4

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    Hi!

    Sorry to hear your having so much trouble!

    I have a terrible sleeper!

    All I can tell you is what we've done which was for Louis to sleep in the bouncer so we could help him get to sleep. Also we rocked him to sleep for ages as we couldn't get him to sleep on his own. We just transferred him to the bouncer or cot when he was asleep. Not the best solution but it may give you some time out.

    Do you think she may be having a bit of pain?? We found that Louis would sleep better in the bouncer because he was a little upright and also we raised one end of the cot up as well.

    I'm sure you're doing a wonderful job!!! Also at this age Louis didn't like to be left alone for 5min which made it very difficult. Just try and bring bubba with you when your doing things if she's happy too...I still put Louis in the bathroom with me so I can have a shower.

    Not sure if any of it helps - Good Luck!!

  5. #5

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    If she loves being held, what about a sling like a hug-a-bub? It is what really helped me in those early days. I'd pop her in and go and slowly hang out the washing. I found being outside helped her get off to sleep. As she really needs sleep, then one nap a day in the sling won't hurt.

  6. #6

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    beck i agree with astrid will she sleep in the HAB? if so maybe just carry her in that for her sleeps i understand they get hot i carry oscar in a sling just in a singlet and nappy so he doesn't get too hot. would lying down on your bed with her help do you think? maybe a breast feed if you are breastfeeding, and you might do well with a sleep during the day as well. just want to let you know that not all babys sleep in their cot. none of mine ever did, we co-sleep and the older ones just naturally went into their own beds when they were ready. so i don't believe it makes a rod for your back! i think babys sence when mum is stressed so she might feel your frustration or stress at her lack of sleep. can you try and forget about clocks and times and just hold her and rock her to sleep maybe. i know this style of parenting is not for everyone. just a suggestion.
    hope you find something that suits.
    beckles

  7. #7
    jess Guest

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    Lahnee didnt like to sleep in her cot during the day until she was 5mths and she would only sleep on her tummy. We ended up setting her portacot up in the lounge as I think she just wanted to be near me and the day to day sounds were comforting. Also, when she was 6, 8 and 12 weeks she had serious growth spurts and wouldnt sleep in her cot or portacot, and would only sleep on me. These were really hard weeks as my little 'parrot' was constantly on my shoulder or on my chest (when I would sleep too). I was scared I was setting myself up for a really nasty sleeping habit, but when the growth spurt passed so did her need to be so close to me. Not sure if its much help, but sometimes the 'general' advise on how to get babies to sleep doesnt always work. Just be willing to try something different...

    Jess

  8. #8

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    Beck, are you going out and about for walks? My HN always said that babies need plenty of fresh air in their lungs to sleep and I think she has something there.

    Maybe she just wants to be near you? HERE is a post I posted almost the same as you but Matthew was 6 months, might be worth a read...I also remember just sitting on the couch with Matthew fast alseep in my arms as that was the only place he would nap - oh the things we do!

    The port-a-cot is a great idea if she is too big for the bassinette?

  9. #9

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    Just wanted to thank everyone for their suggestions. I've found over the last two days (I know it's early but it's promising!) that Maddy has been tired enough to drop off in her pram after a little cry when I give her a workout in her jolly jumper before lunch! *L*

    Have moved the rocking chair into her bedroom and tried to put her down for a nap today by sitting in the rocking chair so she could feel secure about Mummy still being around. Sadly it didn't work but I think I jumped the gun a little before she was truly tired.

    Off to cook dinner while princess is still sleeping!

  10. #10

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    Oh Beck I hope the sleep keeps up!.

    I so feel for you as Kaitlyn was a HORRIBLE sleeper during the day as well. I remember for the first month or so I would spend whole days feeding , playing and crying with her!. She would never sleep and when she finally did it was only for 45mins. But then come 7pm she would pass out and sleep until 530am!. For the first 3months we used to go out LOTS ..car...pram...car pram..I used to feel like a bad mum but I had to do it to stay sane !. I would order a takeaway coffee jump in the car and she would sleep while I drove around!.Now Kaitlyn can sometimes have 2 x 2hour sleeps a day in her cot and she worked that out herself.

    I must say we used to let her cry sometimes for a few minutes if we had been trying to settle her for a long time at night. Sometimes she needed to get rid of some energy if she was overtired. Now I dont really need to do that often.

    Mind you ...teeth is buggering her sleep up again! will they ever sleep

    Hang in there!

  11. #11

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    Milo is not a very good daytime sleeper either.

    I really don't want to go down the road of controlled crying. ATM I put him down when I think he's tired say goodnight or whatever, and walk out. If he's still crying after 30 seconds, I go back in & try to settle him & repeat this.

    Sometimes it works, other times he's up til the next feed

  12. #12

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    If mine doesn't fall asleep at a feed then I put her into the rocker beside my feet and rock her. I just use this time as computer or reading time. I stay there ready to rock when she stirs to make sure she gets a good sleep. I find this much better, still works at 1 yr. The couple of times shes fought it I have changed it to the pram for a couple of days.

    Works like a charm. She does have a nice new expensive Boori cot but she doesn't use it as it just seems to scare her more then anything. I did try transferring her into it asleep but if she didn't wake up when laying her in it she would wake up at the end of the 45min sleep cycle and would not go back to sleep, which would just make her overtired, grumpy and harder at night so I gave up.

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