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Thread: Another bubby with settling issues.... Help needed!

  1. #1

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    Default Another bubby with settling issues.... Help needed!

    Blake has had problems settling and staying asleep. He still doesn't sleep through the night, waking for either a feed or two, or his dummy.

    That however is not today's issue.

    I'm finding now that whever he goes to bed - unless he's fallen asleep at the bb - he will lie there kicking at his blankets unless they are firmly tucked in, and ususally wedged into place with a rolled up nappy or two each side of his cot.



    Even with him firmly tucked in, he will attempt to kick his way out. I don't really want to 'straight jacket' him into bed so he can't move however he will not let himself relax enough to fall asleep by himself.

    I've tried comforting him in my arms, quietly in his room until he's really relaxed and 'ready for sleep' however as soon as I put him down he starts kicking before I even get to tuck his in. I've also tried not tucking him in at all, dressing him warm enough and having no sheet/blanket on his bed - again not successful.

    Please help with ideas for settling him so he's not playing for hours, nor kicking for hours!

  2. #2
    Kirsty77 Guest

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    Oh Rachel this sounds so familar!Gemma has just started to do this in the last week! Even to the point of rotating around the cot by herself with limbs hanging out everywhere! Gem used to be asleep when I put her in her cot at night, falling asleep on the bottle.But now shes's wide awake and when I put her down she's wide awake but not crying.We decided to just let her play and talk until she falls asleep on her own.She also now pulls the dummy in and out of her mouth and when she can't find her mouth she cries so we are constantly going in and out of her room to put it back in for her, then suddenly it goes quiet and shes out of it!She also kicks the blankets off but we leave her be and realised that she'll let us know if shes cold!(and normally she plays in her cot and talks for at least an hour before she falls asleep!)

    Hth's

  3. #3
    Melinda Guest

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    Is Blake getting upset when he's doing the kicking, or is it just something that he does because it's fun? Is it possible that being put to bed has turned into a bit of a game for him because it's fun to kick the blankets off?

    The reason I ask, is because around the same age (a bit younger actually from memory) Jacob started to do the same thing. He would kick the blankets off each time we put him to bed. He'd start doing it as soon as I started trying to tuck him in and he thought it was one great big game and would be giggling away. In the end, we decided to do away with the blankets and just put him into a sleeping bag - so there was nothing for him to kick off, no games to be played in bed! That solved the problem for us (he worked out that there was nothing to do in bed except sleep IYKWIM) and saved us being concerned about him getting cold. (Mind you, Jacob developed other sleeping problems at 6.5m, and that's a whole different issue!)

    He is now 16.5m old, and it was only when he was 13m old that we re-introduced blankets and he doesn't kick them off now, but he does wriggle out of them quite a bit during sleep.

    I'm not sure if any of that has helped....sorry!

  4. #4

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    Melinda, how long did it take Jacob to settle down to sleep. I tried yesterday to dress Blake warmly so he didn't need any blankets at all so he had nothing in the bed to kick or play with. Instead of sleeping he played with his feet - he LOVES his feet - for about an hour until I gave up. I'd been going into him to resettle him and replug his dummy. He wasn't crying but I could hear him playing and kicking around so he wasn't sleeping.

    I think you are right that he's turning bed time into a game but I'm wondering how long it will take to get him out of it. If he's tired he falls straight asleep, but there are times where he's showing all the tired signs and just going there to play. ](*,)

  5. #5
    Melinda Guest

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    That's so tricky isn't it! When they are displaying tired signs and you put them to bed but they happily play in there!

    We still encounter that very problem now, Rachel. Not every day, but certainly at least once a fortnight I would say! A prime example would be today LOL. I put Jacob to bed at 11.30 and I've heard him in there playing for 45 minutes but I think he's gone to sleep now as it's dead quiet LOL.

    So sometimes it seems it can take quite a while. I used to get really worried about this when he was younger and think to myself that it would muck up his sleeps for the rest of the day, or for the night, or that he'd never go to sleep etc. I don't worry about it quite so much now though. As long as he's happy in there, then I just leave him to it. I know that he's safe and happy if he's just playing in his cot. So I let it run it's course and have that wind down time to himself and I figure that if he actually doesn't go to sleep himself after an hour or hasn't cried and needed me to go in to give him his dummy to help him go to sleep, then he's probably not tired. But then I tell myself that he has had the benefit of some quiet time in his cot which is probably relaxing in itself. I can honestly say, that days where this happens - and he goes to sleep say an hour after he's been put to bed, it hasn't interferred with his sleeping patterns overnight. He may go to bed a fraction later, but that's about it really.

    So I guess my suggestion would be that if you think Blake is tired, then sure, put him to bed. If he plays in there and he's happy, just leave him to it because he may play/chat himself to sleep (I found this difficult to do in the beginning because I was worried about his sleep getting out of whack for the rest of the day or overnight so I'd be going in trying to settle him when he was quite happy on his own IYKWIM?).

    Having said that, go into him if he cries because he's probably started to genuinely become tired then and just needs that bit of help or the dummy to go to sleep - we find that Jacob will either put himself to sleep or start to get grizzly and we'll give him his dummy then and off to sleep he goes. There's only been one or two occasions where he hasn't gone to sleep at all after an hour or so, so we've gotten him up, had a further little play, perhaps a drink and snack and before you know it, he is totally ready for bed!

    I'm not sure if that helps at all or if I've just waffled on LOL!!!

  6. #6

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    Mel, it has helped. It's great to know someone's been through the same as I'm encountering. It's great to hear what worked for you.

    And yes, it sounds exactly what's happening with Blake.

    I appreciate your words of wisdom and experience.

    Even though I've done it before with DD 8 years ago, it's nice just to get someone elses outlook on things. :flower:

  7. #7
    Melinda Guest

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    Absolutely Rachel! Let me know how you get on won't you!

    I know how worried I was about leaving him to his own devices in there (and I can't tell you how many times I stood right outside the door listening! LOL), but he was/is happy and safe there. But over time I got used to it and Jacob seemed to settle himself to sleep if he didn't go to sleep right away and now I don't worry about it at all - he will sleep when he's tired by putting himself to sleep as soon as I pop him in the cot, or if he cries, then I go straight into him and help him to sleep. So at nap times, my motto became "happy = hands off, crying = hands on"!!!

    Good luck!

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