DS self-settles so I know the issue is not that - he's just not ready to go all night yet. DH and I are both happy to go with it (for now anyway) so we'll just go with the flow.
Yeah... DD self settled for her first 8 months.. she just didn't STAY asleep! Of course after the 8 months she decided she needed help getting to sleep... so we're still working through that at the moment. We all get there in the end

I think also that sometimes as parents we take credit for things that are really just a function of our baby's personality or developmental stage.
I totally agree with that. I don't take credit for my children walking at 11 months, and I also don't harrass other mothers by saying their children should be walking by now! Could you imagine if we went around saying "what? your baby is still crawling at 11 months?? OMG you must be doing something wrong!" HAHAHA. I just don't get why sleep is such a point of comparison. Aah well... all dates back to the Truby King days I guess..