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Thread: Family Functions and Socialising Bub

  1. #1

    Default Family Functions and Socialising Bub

    I've just come home early with bub from a family function - left hubby there. My hubby has 5 siblings and it was his sister's 50th. Two sisters flew in from the Eastern States and his parents came down from the country, so needless to say with partners of siblings it was a fairly large gathering.
    The trouble is my bub who is 6 months hasn't seen most of that side of the family, let alone all in the one room - and they are all really loud people. So he got upset before I fed him, upset when I tried to put him to sleep and then was inconsolable. And everyone wanted to poke their faces right at him.
    So because bub was so upset I started to stress so I made the decision to go home with bub and left hubby with the family who were all upset that I was leaving with bub.
    I feel like a heel
    The trouble is bub is not used to loud gatherings like that and I do have him in a pretty strict routine. I can just hear comments like 'well hes going to have to get used to it - blah blah blah'
    Its alright for them - they don't have to deal with a stressed crying baby!!
    Sorry - had to vent. It frustrates me though! Why is it when you are pregnant families tend to leave you to it and then as soon as you have the baby he/she seems to become the property of others and you seem to get labelled 'as this type of mother or that type of mother?
    I had a slice of toast for tea and amongst other yummy things they had chocolate trifle at this gathering and it looked awesome
    However bub is sound asleep and looks very peaceful


  2. #2

    Default

    Oh, this is my family! My mother demands I play pass the baby, she calls me a bad mother because of the way I do things and he starts when DH sneezes, he's going to really hate the family gatherings! But in some ways yes, he does have to get used to it, but not just yet! At least we have our own car and DH is fine leaving places early.

    TBH, DS is more important than not upsetting a group of people I only see twice a year. And he has a good set of lungs (takes after my side LOL) so will be able to tell people to back off - and he will! Baby has a bedtime a little bit before everyone else's so of course baby has to leave early, that's how I play it with parties. I keep DS up as long as he's happy, then when he gets grumpy it's bedtime, I change him into his pyjamas at the party, say night night to everyone then drive home.

    Good luck with the comments that are probably about to come! And vent away, I'm always here to listen and join in.

  3. #3

    Join Date
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    Default

    Wow you just descirbed what my husbands family can be like! Theres 4 siblings and they are a pretty loud family. At times they say annoying things like "let me cuddle MY BABY" and I'm just thinking "umm your baby?". Its always pass the baby and it does make her unsettled being raound loud people and loud parties and being passed around a lot. I mean, she spends all day with just me, so she isnt really used to big crowds of loud people. When she was 7 or 8 weeks old we went to MIL's 60th and it was a huge party and I ended up out in the car for over an hour because I wanted to leave but DH didnt, and the party was out in woop woop and I didnt know the way back to the place we were staying at.

    I've left many a party early, or gone outside and sat in the car with Claire while I just waited for DH to get bored and want to leave the party. His friends are into loud movies and games, so it doesnt work well when she is tired. Its hard to stay at a party with a cranky baby. You dont have all the familiarity of your own home and there is usually nowhere quiet or comfortable enough to settle bub.

    Honestly, dont worry too much about it. I'm sure people will understand that you cant always stay out late with a 6 month old. I hope you dont get too many annoying comments from them.

  4. #4

    Default

    Oh thank goodness!!!! I'm normal!!!

    This wasn't really a 'comforted sleeping' sort of topic...only from the point of view that when he was screaming - there was no comfort in his sleeping and when I got him home he went off to sleep straight away and didn't wake until 6.30am.

    Thanks for your words of support, its good to know that other mums experience the same thought of thing.

    I have to make the telephone call today to the sister who turned 50 as we'll be over at her place for Christmas and I need to know what she would like me to bring. So I'm steeling myself for the 'he needs to get used to it' comment. Having said that maybe I will be pleasantly surprised and nothing will be said.

    Anyway, enjoy your Christmas

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